Apathetic Resolutions for 2007

Making my New Year’s Resolutions used to be a painful process, mostly because I knew deep down it was a waste of time.  I’d make rash commitments to change my bad habits but rarely achieve my goals.  I’ve finally figured out why – because I always set the bar too high!   Failure sucks.  So this year I’m going to make resolutions that I know I’ll be able to keep.  I think this could be called the lazy ass method of auto suggestion.  

1.  In 2007 I will buy lots of books, mostly from Chapters, often on sale.  I will stock pile them beside my bed and enjoy the lovely sense of anticipation they give me just by being there.  Some of them I will read from beginning to end.  Some of them will end up on the partly-read shelf with colorful book marks sticking out of them.  I will feel a little bit guilty about how long they remain there untouched, but this amount of remorse will not be strong enough to make me pick them up and try again until the stock pile is gone and desperation for something/anything to read sets in.

2.  In 2007 I will keep going to work and making payments on our line of credit.  (This resolution is in no way to be interpreted as a promise to PAY OFF the line of credit, or to be confused in any way with former vows to stop making major purchases using it.) 

3.  I will think really hard about starting to paint seriously again.  Then I will imagine all the out-dated supplies that need to be thrown out, the things that need to be replaced, the time it would take to get myself organized, and how much simpler life would be if I just simply continued to put the whole thing off indefinitely.  But heavy-duty thinking about something is good, right?

4.  I absolutely will not save those little plastic things that hold the end of bread bags closed. And I will not let the fact that my mother-in-law does this (for reasons unknown) drive me insane.  I might even once again take the whole jar full of them from the camp countertop and throw them all in the fire pit, just to see if that silly little act of childish defiance gives me the same rush the second time around.

5.  I will continue in my brave quest to try every blend of starbucks coffee ever made. 

6.  I will devote a ridiculous amount of time to my blog in particular and the computer world in general, ignoring the state of my surroundings and the physical and mental health of myself and those around me.  What the hell.  It worked out okay last year.   

There – I’m feeling really really good about this.  Originally I was going to go for a dozen, but cutting that number in half seems somehow appropriate in this case.  I think these are all sufficiently inane and attainable goals.  No need to wish me luck!  Bring it on, 2007!  I’m ready for you. 

One thought on “Apathetic Resolutions for 2007

  1. Those are some truly awesome resolutions. I’m thinking of adopting resolution #1 myself. Oh, wait. I’ve already been doing that for the past two years. I guess I’ll just resolve to keep doing it.

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