Canada: 243,000 km of Coastline! (and other things to love)

Never heard of Canada, eh? Pity. It’s BIG and BEAUTIFUL and FREE. A multicultural, peaceful democracy, often stunned by its own success. (think Winter Olympics, for an example) A land of equal opportunity, diversity, and a strange obsession with regionalism, although hockey can bind us all together. Normally just a quietly magnificent nation. But once in a while we’re LOUD and proud.

THE “I AM CANADIAN” RANT

Hey,

I’m not a lumberjack, or a fur trader,

and I don’t live in an igloo,

or eat blubber

or own a dogsled.

And I don’t know Jimmy, Sally or Suzy from Canada,

although I’m certain they’re really, really nice.

I have a prime minister… not a president,

I speak English and French, not American

and I pronounce it About, not A-boot.

I can proudly sew my country’s flag on my backpack,

I believe in peacekeeping, not policing,

diversity not assimilation,

and that the beaver is a truly proud and noble animal.

A toque is a hat,

a Chesterfield is a couch,

and it IS pronounced Zed,

not Zee… ZED!!

Canada is the 2nd largest land mass,

the 1st nation of hockey,

and the best part of North America.

My name is Joe…

and…I……AM……CANADIAN!

Thank you.

I’ve often thought we should put that to music and make it our national anthem. It’s also a pretty good beer.

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