A (Comic Strip) Book Character I’d Like to Be

When I answered this (almost identical) question on the 9th of August, over an entire MONTH ago, I wanted to be Luna Lovegood. Well, I have matured considerably since then.

Now I aspire to be Alice. Seriously. For one thing, just look at that hair! She gets to wear a pink suit, she is technically proficient and very highly paid, she has a coffee obsession and a magnificent ‘take-no-crap’ attitude.

Because of her violent temper, she often puts her “fist of death” to good use, even against her Pointy Haired Boss. She has drop kicked a computer off her building (killing a major customer), and accidently crushed a man walking by her cubicle by throwing her computer over the wall, and later been rewarded bonuses for these and other “cost saving ideas”.

Alice always throws the Pointy-Haired Boss a fairly long distance as a result of her annual performance review. (Once as she is threatening to yank him out of his cheap suit and hurl his naked body down the hall, Dilbert and Wally remark on how her distance improves every year.)

And she gets to say awesome stuff like “Okay, let me explain this in the simplest possible way… you…are…an…idiot.”

There are days when all Alice wants to do is scream and punch people. If I get her character down pat, maybe early retirement is in my future.

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