Beam Me Up

Always liked the idea of beaming myself somewhere and skipping the wait at the airport or the long hours cooped up in a car. I know getting there is supposed to be half the fun, but sometimes it actually isn’t.

Wishing for something is one thing, having it as a real possibility is another thing entirely. Teleportation is a scary concept, so I’m sure I’ll be one of the skeptical people who holds back and waits to see how it goes for all those adventurous types before trying it out myself.

Chances are good that I’ll be a strong advocate for wormholes as a viable alternative, and a safer mode of transportation. Taking a speed-of-light shortcut through space and time while keeping the traveller intact has a certain appeal over being disassembled and put back together. Jumpgates, portals, stargates – could we please try those things first?

All in all, it sounds like a whole new way to lose your luggage, never mind the various molecules that might go missing en route to your destination. Missing fat molecules I could deal with, but the rest of my bits and pieces I’m not so sure I want to risk being without. Call me pathetically old-fashioned, but I’m kind of happy with my present continuity of existence.

I don’t want to arrive all messed up in some strange place being told to pull myself together and having no clue how to do that. So go ahead and beam yourself halfway across the planet, work out all the beaming kinks and hitches, and hopefully by the time teleportation is safely perfected I’ll be too damn old to care where I am or how I got there.

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