To children I look very old; compared to dirt I’m young.
I’m often shy and rarely bold and thus I bite my tongue.
With midgets I am rather tall; with giants I appear quite small.
I’m thinner than an elephant and fatter than a dime.
When people are rushing madly about I want to take my time.
If no one is wearing a lab coat I am sure to stand out in mine.
I’m the woman in the check out line who can never find her card.
I do not like to travel and prefer my own backyard.
I like to stand out in the rain and never wear a hat
Risking catching my death of a cold because really, who does that?