1. Visit the dentist for a check up the next time before something goes wrong. It’s his turn to be shocked.
2. Learn how to hold that stupid suction thing properly while the hygienist tries to drown you with her power washer. Or whatever it’s called.
3. Floss. Rinse. Repeat.
4. Be proud of yourself because now you are finally brave enough to forego being laughing-gassed practically into a state of unconsciousness for everything, including the initial consultation.
5. Be thankful every day for the rest of your life that Steve Martin is not your dentist.