What I’ve Learned From A Smoothie A Day

another dam listYes, it’s another damn list, never mind how the beaver spells it.  This list is in my normal random scatter brained order, important points cleverly interspersed amongst the mundane and useless.

1.  I have learned that baby kale has better blending qualities in a smoothie than mature tough-as-boot-leather all grown up kale.  I freeze little zip lock bags stuffed with spinach and kale and use one in every smoothie.

2.  Avocado pits take for flaming ever to grow roots.  From now on I’m just going to toss them in the compost box and let them fend for themselves.

3.  Lemon seeds disappear in a blender, freeing one from the task of laboriously digging them out of the lemon before adding it to the blender.  Now I just throw the whole thing in there and forget about the seeds. So far no lemon trees have grown out of my ears.

4.  Don’t touch the blueberries with your bare hands.  Unless you like blue hands and stubborn blue stains under your fingernails.

5.  Cut back on the antioxidant juices or coconut water to about half and use calorie free water instead.  Yes, it took me longer than the normal person to figure this one out.

6.  A Starbucks tumbler and a straw combine to make it less likely that my lips will turn a color not normally found in nature.  For lips, anyway.

7.  A good veggie powder is better than a protein powder.  This is my opinion, based on reading somewhere that you shouldn’t mix protein with fruit.  I prefer to get my protein from other sources, such as actual chicken breasts.  Some things are better left unblended.

8. Chia seeds appear to be indestructible, which makes me wonder if and how they’re being digested.  Apparently you can grind them up, but seriously, who has time for chia seed grinding.  Not me.

9.  Cinnamon and ginger add subtle flavor, but turmeric tastes weird.  I now take turmeric in tasteless capsule form.

10.  Besides going half-assed gluten-free, I am also trying to cut back on dairy.  I no longer put huge globs of Greek yogurt in my smoothies, and frankly, I don’t miss it.  The avocado and a banana add enough thickness.

11.  I need to stop reading all those health food going green articles because every time I do there’s another ingredient I feel compelled to add to my morning blender concoction from hell.  Besides, one of these days I’ll probably come across some dire warning about smoothies being bad for you.  With all health crazes it’s just a matter of time.

12.  My skin looks better, I’ve lost some weight, and breakfast has never been more fun.  I’ve been drinking these things haphazardly for a couple of years, and religiously for about six months.  Even if the various health benefits are all in my head, I don’t care.  If nothing else, I am doing my part to keep spinach farmers in business.

A Recipe!

I’m so excited!  I’ve never posted a recipe on my blog before!

It’s Sunday and work doesn’t start until 11:00 so I’ve got some time to kill and I’m sitting here enjoying my breakfast shake and thinking it would be a brilliant idea to share it.

So here’s the ingredients.

1.  A cup or so of some kind of healthy fruit juice mixture, the more purple and weird the better.  (Blueberry and Pomegranate is my favourite, but if boring old orange works for you, that’s perfectly okay.)

2.  1 banana (but not the skin, for those of you who don’t cook a lot)

3.  2 scoops of Arbonne Essentials Vitamin/Mineral Shake Mix (Vanilla).  Or you could substitute your choice of protein powder, but the Arbonne stuff is the absolute best.

4.  Some frozen fruit, like blueberries, raspberries, strawberries, blackberries.  Obviously I’m partial to berries, but any fruit works, as long as it’s frozen.

5.  A big glob (sorry, I don’t measure) of greek yogurt.  (Yes, if you must, you can use whatever yogurt you like, but the greek stuff is VERY good.)  I use plain or vanilla.

6.  Anything else you might have hanging around that you’d like to get rid of.  I’ve added some orange sections, a couple of carrot ends, and a sliced apple – but not all at the same time.  Don’t get too carried away.

Method:  Place all ingredients in a blender and mix it up on the highest setting.  Does anybody ever use any of those other buttons?  I do everything on Liquefy because that’s the whole point of blenders.

Pour into a tall glass and enjoy.  It should be smooth and cold and delicious.

Now all it needs is a name.  Like Liquefied Lunch, because it doesn’t have to be limited to a morning meal.

There’s a girl at work who mixes up skim milk with a banana, peanut butter, and four cups of spinach.  I can’t comment on how it tastes because I’ve never tried it, but I can tell you it is extremely GREEN.  So it’s quite amazing the things we can consume when they’re all smushed up and unrecognizable.

But if you’re new at this, my advice is to start off with purple first. It doesn’t look like it’s good for you even though it is;  whereas green is not fooling anyone.