Tag Archives: communication

W’s Return

W arrived home yesterday from his long sojourn in Ontario.  He was gone for almost six months!  We have a lot to catch up on.  You forget how different communication can be when it’s face to face, as compared to flat words on a screen when you’re texting.  Even talking on the phone, although better, can be hit and miss.  There’s all those facial expressions and hand gestures and subtle body language clues you can’t see that fill in a lot of blanks and missing parts.

Dona Paula Los Cardos Malbec, 2007
Dona Paula Los Cardos Malbec, 2007 (Photo credit: mmwm)

We went out for dinner because we’re both sick of cooking for ourselves.  (Has it really been months and months since I went out to eat?  I think it has!)  Then we shared some Dona Paula Malbec when we got home. Stayed up way too late.  I’m not used to the satellite radio being on 24/7 but something tells me I’m going to have to incorporate that into my previously quiet life alone.  As long as I can sneak in a lot of jazz stations, we should be okay.

Encyclopaedia Britannica
Encyclopaedia Britannica (Photo credit: septuagesima)

We are ‘inheriting’ the Encyclopaedia Britannica that W’s parents have had for 50 odd years – I am SO excited, although all he was able to bring back with him this time were the Book of the Year volumes from 1962 through to 1978.  Seventeen volumes of the back drop history of our lives.  Since I didn’t pay much attention to it while it was happening, I expect to learn a lot of new and amazing things.

But before I can get to that, there’s work.  I’ve been joking that now it’s MY turn to take a six-month leave of absence.  Maybe I’m not really kidding about that – the idea has a lot of appeal.

Anyway, it’s nice to have my main source of inspiration for sarcastic complaining back home safe and sound.

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Romance

Love does not consist of gazing at each other, but looking outward in the same direction. (Antoine de Saint-Exupery)

How do I define romance? Romance is a novel and a movie genre. They tell stories about people and events that make us believe we would like to have similar things happen to us in real life. But they probably won’t. These are stories of heart racing excitement and deep emotional desires and mystery and idealistic love affairs. The tales are intense and adventurous and crazy and usually end blissfully and happily with two perfect soul mates together forever at last. (Insert deep wistful sigh here.)

The idea of romance either genuinely appeals to people because they believe it can happen to them, or it makes people uncomfortable and pessimistic and skeptical because they are sure that only air heads take the notion seriously.

I married a man who really does not have much of a sense of romance. He doesn’t buy me roses or ride around on a white steed saving me from lonely towers, or sweep me off my feet with grand gestures and candle lit dinners and weekends in Paris. He’s never thrown pebbles at my window and proclaimed his undying love for me on bended knee for all the world to hear and see. I’m pretty sure he knows something like that would probably crack me up.

What we do have is an intimacy based on communication, deep friendship, respect for each other, sharing, and a more subdued kind of love that is long-lasting. Romance is a good thing at the beginning of a relationship, but in the long haul if you keep it up it’s going to wear you right out.

So yes, I’m one of those air heads that likes the romantic stories, the boy meets girl, soul mates bond forever fairy tales. The happy endings are so satisfying and lovely when all the characters finally get things sorted out and accept their fates of being hopelessly devoted to each other for life.

If you over-estimate the importance of romance in a relationship you will be disillusioned eventually. You don’t have to give up on it entirely, but it is best to be realistic and realize it takes some effort and maturity to make things work. Still, a lot of candle-lit dinners can’t hurt.

“Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable.” (Bruce Lee)

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Technology I Don’t Feel Like Living Without

English: Mobile phone evolution Русский: Эволю...
English: Mobile phone evolution Русский: Эволюция мобильных телефонов (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

What’s one piece of technology you can’t live without?

Have you ever had to go without it? What happened?

I should just not bother answering this prompt at all, it’s put me in such foul humor.

If I can’t LIVE without something, and I have to go without it, ergo, I DIE.

And it begs such a flippant drama queen kind of answer. OMG, without my cell phone I could not possibly SURVIVE!! Kind of makes you want to grab that little piece of technology and stomp on it to see if there’s any truth to the statement.

We need an adjective between the words ‘can’t’ and ‘live’. Happily, comfortably, sanely. Any of those would do.

And the term technology itself covers so much ground – our lives are chained to so many different kinds with links everywhere, who wants to risk breaking the chain? I think I could give up nuclear weapons technology, but medical technology, not so much. I’m also rather fond of electricity. And my car.

But people lived for a long time without those things, so we know it can be done. We all just love our conveniences and have become so absolutely spoiled by them that they’d now be complete hell to give up.

But would it KILL us? Probably not immediately.

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