Under The Bed

img_2933

(http://sha-1.deviantart.com/art/Under-the-bed-II-154800409)

A comprehensive (because I like adjectives) list of things I believed were under my bed during my early childhood.

  1. Alligators (this was long before Mercer Mayer wrote a book about it)
  2. Bad men wearing masks, ready to grab the ankles of children foolish enough to forget to take a flying leap halfway across the bedroom after waking up in the morning.  These same men were never around at bedtime.   It was just the mornings you had to worry about.  So I assume they only worked the day shift.
  3. Anything that mysteriously went missing, including socks, siblings and money.
  4. Dust Bunnies the size of tumbleweeds. (No child worries about that – that’s more    a present day thing). Scratch number four.

I know, it’s not a very long list.  I advanced fairly quickly to scary things lurking in closets and on the roof.

Under the bed became a great place for shoving things when you needed to tidy up in a hurry.  So I guess it got too crowded under there and the alligators and the masked men were forced to move on.

Easy as ABC

image
This post idea comes to you directly from Holly at Bloggity Ramblings, stolen from a number of sources, by the looks of things. Thanks Holly et al!

It’s a list!  It’s the ABC’s!  It’s all about MEEEEEE!!!!!!  My kind of thing for sure since I feel I’m an expert on the subject.  Feel free to copy the alphabet prompts and share yourself with your tribe.

A: Age – 66 and counting.  Next birthday is Friday the 13th in May.  My grandma started warning us at the age of 75 during every Christmas we were trying to celebrate that it could be her last.  I’m going to keep up this tradition starting soon.  She lived to be 99.

B: Biggest Fear – Deep water and being unable to breathe.  So drowning, in other words.  In a previous life I either did not survive the sinking of the Titanic, or I fell asleep in the bathtub.

C: Current Time – Well past noon.  I vow to finish this before the day ends.

D: Drink I Last Had – Coffee.  But before that I drank a big Starbucks tumbler of  Crystal Light (acai white peach papaya flavour) laced with a couple of tablespoons of apple cider vinegar, because it’s supposed to be good for many things, including lowering blood sugar.  I’m not recommending this concoction to anyone, because frankly it tastes even worse than incredibly bad wine.  Therefore it must be healthy and good for you of course, since all bad tasting things are.

E: Easiest Person to Talk to – My sister Ann.  I could tell her how happy I am to know that before we were born our souls chose to be sisters in this lifetime and she would not say I’m crazy.  Well, not out loud and to my face, anyway.

F: Favorite Song – Happy Birthday to you…..I know all the words and most of the tune.

G: Grossest Memory – It’s not all that gross, but it is funny.  My son wanted to have a collection of something and decided to save his toenail clippings.  Unlimited source and not a lot of thought or effort involved.  His passion for this hobby was thankfully short-lived.

H: Hometown – Port Elgin, Ontario, Canada, although I grew up on a nearby farm.

I: In Love With – Life.

J: Jealous Of – People who have more money than brains.  Although not so much the no brains part of that one.

K: Killed Someone?  Not yet.  Hopefully never.  Have watched a lot of murder mysteries and am not confident I could get away with it.

L: Longest Relationship –  Met W in March 1970 and married him in November 1971.  So that’s 46 years of wondering what the hell he’s going to do next.

M: Middle Name – Mae.  There’s a few of those in my family history.  It’s a good name.

N: Number of Siblings – three – one older brother, two younger sisters.

O: One Wish – Good health.  And if I can’t have that, acceptance of whatever life hands me, with grace and dignity.  Because foot stomping and howling is probably not the most attractive way to deal with shit.

P: Last Person You Called – Seriously it was probably a doctor’s office.

Q: Question You Are Always Asked – What the hell is wrong with you??  Haha…just kidding.  Is that your natural hair colour?  Because it is pretty much grey/white but with very dark hair at the back of my neck and my forehead.  Like anyone would do that on purpose.

R: Reason to Smile – I’m retired!  I could paint all day if I felt like it!

S: Song You Last Sang – Hotel California, but only in my head while trying to get to sleep.

T: Time You Woke Up – Yes, yes it is.

U: Underwear Colour – mostly black.  In fact almost everything I wear is black in my unsuccessful quest to become invisible.

V: Vacation Destination – I love to go home to Ontario to visit family.

W: Worst Habit – procrastination.

X: X-Rays You’ve Had – lower back, chest, teeth/jaw.  Then it’s on to MRI’s and CT Scans.  There are some doctors who know me inside out.

Y: Your Favorite Food – Salted peanuts.  It’s the first thing that popped in to my head.  We don’t have any in the house at the moment.  Damn.

Z: Zodiac Sign – Taurus.  Sign of the procrastinating peanut lover.

Okay, it’s your turn!

All My Fears From A to Z

This image was selected as a picture of the we...

This image was selected as a picture of the week on the Malay Wikipedia for the 29th week, 2010. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Fear Factor Daily Prompt:  People are afraid of all kinds of things: spiders, the dark, or being enclosed in small spaces. Tell us about your greatest fear — rational or irrational.

I am a day behind with this, so I guess we can rule out the fear of being late.  There is no one major area of crippling paranoia for me.  Just a lot of minor annoying (but, of course, completely rational) phobias which I have decided to organize into an alphabetical list.

1.  Aliens (especially the ones that are cleverly disguised and walking among us.) (Hey, I’ve seen the documentaries, I know about these things)

2.  Bats (the kind that fly around at night wanting to get tangled up in your hair)

3.  Cancer

4.  Drowning

5.  Explosions

6.  Falling (hard and awkwardly enough to break bones) (or down an abandoned mine shaft)

7.  Germs (and people who don’t wash their germy hands)

8.  Heights (rooftops and beyond)

9.  Illnesses of the fatal variety

10.  Job interviews (avoiding them is the reason I’ve been doing the same job for so long)

11. Karaoke (Really, that shit is scary)

12. Lightning bolts

13.  Memory loss and Madness (although if I do go mad, who knows, it might just be a different kind of happy)

14.  Natural disasters

15.  Oceans

16.  Pain

17.  Quicksand

18.  Roller Coasters

19.  Swimming (without a life jacket) (in the ocean) (…which would lead to drowning….)

20.  Typhoons

21.  Unidentified Flying Objects

22.  Violence (physical, verbal, abuse of any kind)

23.  Wasps

24.  Xenophobia (Yes, I know, fear of a fear.  But until we get over our fear of strangers and foreign things,  peace on earth will never happen)

25.  Yeti

26.  Zombies

I probably won’t write a children’s alphabet book based on this list, complete with frightening illustrations, although stranger things have been done with the alphabet.  And many of the things I’ve listed (like the last two, for instance), I have no actual personal experience with whatsoever.  They just seem to me to be absolutely fear-worthy.

What are you afraid of?