Wolf Moon in a Snow Storm

https://www.istockphoto.com/photos/wolf-howl

Well that looks more like a wolf in a forest fire or hot lava. Or Mars. Oh well.

Every two or three days I get a reminder from Word Press, all cheery and motivational. ”It’s time to blog on Breathing Space!” Do something constructive while you’re sitting there on your ass, you lazy little twit! That last bit is inferred of course. I like to read a lot of bizarre extras into innocent things. It gets progressively more difficult to ignore these pesky notifications without guilt, so here I am at last. In my defence it HAS been less than a month since my last bit of blather, and it IS January after all. Both excellent excuses, right? I’m making a new rule for myself. No blogging in January until the month is more than halfway over. Also this rule is subject to revision like all my other life rules.

Tonight is the night of the Wolf Moon! I am so excited! First full moon of the New Year! We also have a snow storm warning today so the chances of seeing a moon worthy of howling at here are a bit slim I’m afraid. Like I’d be out there in ANY January weather checking it out anyway. So, not THAT excited after all I guess.

Other names for this special moon: (I looked them up in the Farmer’s Almanac) (I am ”my parents subscribed to this magazine” years old)

Center Moon (Assiniboine)

Cold Moon, Frost Exploding Moon, Great Moon (Cree)

Freeze Up Moon (Algonquin)

Severe Moon, Hard Moon (Dakota)

Canada Goose Moon (Tlingit)

Spirit Moon (Ojibwe)

January is obviously a good month for sitting around dreaming up moon names.

For us it’s been time spent more concerned than normal (whatever normal might be during a pandemic) about getting sick. Close family who spent Christmas with us are all triple vacinated, and yet a few of them have tested positive for Covid since then. Thankfully in all cases the symptoms have been relatively mild and over in a few days, but it’s still a scary situation to be in. After all this time of being vigilant and careful it’s so disheartening to have rampant cases of this new variant around and having next to no chance of preventing exposure to it unless you lock yourself in your bathroom and never come out. Never mind, if yours isn’t an air tight room, that one probably won’t work well either.

Anyway, what are your personal plans for this festive Frosty Snow Squally Frost Exploding Moon Evening? It’s the only one we’ll see in 2022 so I hope you’re acting accordingly and behaving appropriately, or ignoring it completely if that’s your cop-out choice. Just laying a little guilt on you all so I don’t feel so alone.

Did I mention the temperature is also supposed to plumet overnight? Not sure this day could get any better! At least we are still healthy and not in the middle of a raging forest fire or living on Mars! There’s always reasons to be thankful. Stay well and stay warm.

Looking Back and Going Forward

Sometimes I talk like I’m ancient and on deaths door. When I’m gone, before I die, life is short, time to downsize so my kids aren’t left with this colossal mess….stuff like that.  Pretty sure it’s annoying, and not a particularly healthy state of mind to be in for long stretches of time.  Especially considering I’m seventy, not a hundred and ten.

It no doubt comes from a lifetime of worrying about every possible disastrous outcome to even ordinary situations and scenarios.  Unusual ones just raise my anxiety level further.   I like to be ridiculously prepared for everything.  Not a fan of surprises, even if they’re pleasant.  I truly try to live in the moment, breathe deeply, let things go, calm my mind, count my blessings, be grateful for everything I have.  Most of the time I’m really good at that.

But I’m always working on limiting those doom and gloom moments.  One of the biggest reasons for neglecting my writing so much in the last three years or so – people died.  Every time I felt like sitting down to say some profound thing or other, someone much too young to leave this world did just that.  And I was struck dumb and numb, contemplating my own mortality and how fragile we all are, no matter where we are in our lives.  My wonderful father-in-law died in October.  He was 97.  We had a lovely visit with him a couple of weeks prior, and to me it felt like he was just kind of done with it all. Not sad or unhappy, just tired.  So his passing wasn’t unexpected.  Sad of course and he is missed, but I think he had a good life all in all.  It’s the untimely ones that leave me stunned.  They’re the tragedies.  And OMG you just never know!

See how easy that is?  We could all die tomorrow!

Also I have a lot of time on my hands to read the news.  I don’t recommend it actually.  A huge percentage of it is bad and less than truthful.  Misleading and hateful rhetoric is all the rage.  It’s hard not to get sucked in by it all.  But I’m not a fighter.  Passive aggressive for sure, but not a screamer fixing to bash your brains in.  Love and kindness always win in the end, don’t they?  We’re all doomed to hell if they don’t.

And that’s my pep talk for today!  Hope you found it enlightening.  Not totally surprised if you didn’t.  Be kind either way.

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This night nurse pic is what came up when I went to Google and typed in marvel comics followed by my name. Best. Result. Ever. Facebook told me to do it. Now I’m telling you. Listen to the freaky night nurse.

Share Your World – July 24, 2017

List some of your favorites types of teas.

The idea of tea is lovely.  Tea and scones, lemon tea, tea time, cozy tea room, take a tea break, iced tea on a hot day, curl up with a good book and a hot cup of tea.  But to actually brew a pot of the vile stuff and drink it, eww, yuk.  There’s something metallic or acidic about it that I don’t like.  It’s okay to scent candles with or to make shampoo smell nice.  Otherwise I avoid it.

If you had to describe your day as a traffic sign, what would it be?

This one looks like a normal day for me. It basically means “do you have any idea where the hell you’re going?”

What are a couple of things people could do for you on a really bad day that would really help you?

Well they could just sit there with concerned looks on their faces and listen to me rant.  That would be helpful, no advice or solutions necessary.  They could also offer me coffee or chocolate.  Or large sums of money.  Things like that tend to improve my mood.

Regardless of your physical fitness, coordination or agility: If you could be an athlete what would you do? Remember this is SYW, dreaming is always allowed.

The first me-being-athletic thing that pops in to my head is long distance or marathon runner.  Which is pretty funny considering how most days I have trouble motivating myself to walk around the block.  But think of the cool spandex clothes and awesome shoes and sweaty headbands.  Pulling muscles.  Collapsing over the finish line.

Maybe baseball would be a more sane choice for me.  Pinch hitter.  Smacking out spectacular home runs followed by leisurely jaunts around the bases and congratulatory high fives.  I could do that.  (In my dreams.) (You did say dreaming was okay.)  A nightmare on the other hand would be jumping off a diving board head first into deep water.  Who in their right mind thinks that’s a good idea.

Optional Bonus question: What are you grateful for from last week, and what are you looking forward to in the week coming up?

Yesterday I was SO SMART taking advantage of the sunshine to mow the lawn.  It’s been pouring rain ever since and generally cold and windy and miserable.  Definitely not marathon running weather.

I’m looking forward to going north for a visit with family on the weekend.  And then the return home mid August of W who is closing up the cottage early this year mostly I think because he is bored being on his own so much.  Well of course there’s more issues than that.  I wonder if he’s tried overdosing on chocolate.  Probably not. Sounds like something the night nurse might recommend.

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Share Your World – May 15, 2017

How many languages do you speak?

Regrettably, only one.  Although if I truly did regret it, nothing is stopping me from learning to speak another one.  For this to happen I imagine it’s best to have someone fluent in the new language with whom to converse.  Because this person would be able to helpfully correct my pronunciation and grammar after laughing at it.  Thankfully I don’t know anyone like that.

What are you reading, watching, listening to, eating?

I am reading an e-book called “Weightless” by Kandi Steiner.  It’s about eighteen year old Natalie who gets dumped by her boyfriend, decides to hit the gym, and then falls for her personal trainer.  Everybody has issues.  Her friends, her mother, her step dad, her ex and his nasty new girlfriend, her hot trainer and his nasty clients….and she is sorry high school is done and debating what to do next.  And I just want to say “Run, Natalie, run!”  The book was a Kindle daily deal.  Totally worth the money.

I am watching “New Blood”, a BBC detective type series on Netflix.  Season one, episode four, case two, part one.  Not sure why I remember all that and even more confused as to why I feel the need to share it.  Episodes one two and three were case one, parts one two and three.  Maybe I’m just proud of my attention to unimportant details.  I like the main characters and how they end up working together and solving the shit out of stuff.

I am listening to the rain pour down and feeling all smug that I put off starting my walk because of all those menacing dark clouds and thus didn’t get caught in the downpour.

I ate a toasted scrambled egg sandwich on dark European rye bread with ketchup on the side for brunch.  Wow, I am a total detail freak today.

What was the last photo you took with your phone?

There it is at the top of this post.  A piece of cracked sidewalk and some scrubby spring grass.  I was putting my phone back in to my pocket and somehow managed to capture this brilliant moment in time on my walk through one of the alley walk-ways between houses in my neighbourhood yesterday. I hope no one tries to steal this incredible image without my permission.

What is your favorite time of day?

Early morning.  Because coffee.

Optional Bonus question: What are you grateful for from last week, and what are you looking forward to in the week coming up?

I am grateful for a lovely quiet weekend on my own doing pretty much nothing out of the ordinary….even though Sunday was Mothers Day and Saturday was my birthday.  My daughter, son, daughter-in-law and oldest granddaughter sent me texts.  THEY ALL KNOW ME SO WELL!  I don’t like a lot of fuss and I love that they get that.  W sent a text on Sunday night saying sorry he missed my birthday and Happy Mother’s Day and here’s what’s going on with ME….

Is it weird that I’m ok with all of this?  Probably.  Oh well, whatever, weird is good too, right?  I love them all and I am loved and nothing else really matters after that.

Okay, the sun is out!  Time to drag myself away from the IPad and onto the cracked streets and walkways and bike paths of my soaking wet world!  Then I can get back to crime season episode part whatever the hell is going on case solving.  Don’t ever say my priorities are screwed up.  They are, but you don’t need to say it.

 

 

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Share Your World March 27 

(But first some missed questions from last week….)

How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?

I think 40 is a pretty good age to be.  It’s somewhere in the middle of your life after you’re over the trauma involved in being a kid, you’ve gotten pretty good at functioning as an adult, and there’s still so much to do with your life and so many good things to come.  You know, as long as you don’t get hit by a bus or eaten by spiders.

However, I can believe all I want that I’m in my forties until I look in a mirror and go, ‘whoa’, that can’t be right.  It’s funny when some musician or celebrity I’ve known about since I was a teenager is celebrating a birthday and I think it’s shocking how old they are.  Because if i stop to think about it for a minute, I have to admit I’m around that same age myself.  And then I realize we’re both still looking relatively good for being such old farts.

So, you’re on your way out and it’s raining. Do you know where your umbrella is or do you frantically search for it all over your apartment/house?

The umbrellas are in a basket above the coat rack at the back door.  Even though they are very handy, this does not mean that I will remember to grab one on the way out.  Those things are going to look brand new forever.

Do you recharge your energy by going out with friends for a good time or by spending quiet time alone?

Quiet time alone.  I don’t even know what that other thing means.

Name three things you and your spouse, partner or best friend have in common.

1. Coffee first thing in the morning.
2. We are each responsible for our own laundry.
3. Family comes first.  Well, right after coffee and laundry of course.

Does your first or middle name have any significance (or were you named after another family member)?

My middle name is Mae because it sounds good with my first name, like Ellie Mae and Daisy Mae.  But it’s neither of those, thank gawd.  My dads eldest sister was May, my maternal grandmothers nick name was Mae, and I was born in the month of May.  There really was no escaping it, was there?

Music or silence while working?

Definitely silence.  The more silent the better.  I am very easily distracted.  Being distracted makes me irritable.  So shut up and let me drink my coffee before you try to talk to me.  Haha, sorry, I’m still on the things in common with your spouse question.

If you had a special place for your three most special possessions (not including photos, electronics, people or animals), what would they be?

We had a garage sale and then made several big donations to Goodwill.  So any potential most special possessions are now someone else’s problem.  It’s very freeing to get over attachments to things.  Plus it frees up a lot of storage space.  You know, for all those things that aren’t special.  Okay, the real answer is my top dresser drawer.  I don’t even know what all is in there anymore.

The Never List: What are things you know you never will do?

1.  I will never stop being surprised and dismayed when people die.  We are all in our forties so it’s just bizarre when it happens.
2. I will never voluntarily sky dive, deep-sea dive, springboard dive or bungee dive.
3. I will never again be responsible for a pet.  With me these things tend not to end well.  However, as I say this, I am thinking about the video I watched of shelter dogs on a bus being distributed to their new owners and their forever homes and it made me cry and really really want a dog.  For about half an hour until I calmed down and got over it, as little stray dogs everywhere breathed a collective sigh of relief.

Optional Bonus question: What are you grateful for from last week, and what are you looking forward to in the week coming up?

I’m grateful for the witches around the world who have twice now performed their binding spell on the big DT to thwart his and his cohorts efforts to do harm.  Looks to me like it’s working.  We all have to do whatever we do best.

I’m looking forward to April and the REAL start of Spring around here.  Which sometimes isn’t until May actually, but I’ll settle for the snow going away as a good omen.

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In case you slept through the first day of the month.  Not like that would ever happen unless January wore you out completely….

Share Your World – January 30, 2017

What is the most incredible natural venue that you’ve ever seen in person?

I’ve seen the Canadian Rocky Mountains and Arctic icebergs and glaciers and the Atlantic provinces rocky ocean shores.  I’ve been to Niagara Falls.  Those are all pretty impressive.

Whenever I see a picture of Glencoe Scotland I remember how being there gave me just the weirdest feeling of chills and deja vu and I get those sensations all over again.  In another life maybe I died in battle there.  Maybe I just have a green lumpy hills fetish.

I’ve seen the vertical sea cliffs of Santorini from the water and from the bus driving up the zig zag road and from various places at the top of the island looking down.  It made me wonder why any sane person living there would ever let their children go outside to play.  They didn’t inspire awe in me as much as a rather anxious fear and dread thinking about how we had to go back down them to leave the place.

How many siblings do you have? What’s your birth order?

I had an older brother who loved his visit to Santorini and was the reason we traveled there, to remember him.  I have two younger sisters.  So three siblings, but now two.  I am one of the middle children, but the oldest daughter.  How to make a simple question complicated, right?  Quite often I make people regret asking me things.

If you were a shoe, what kind would you be and why?

Oh, probably an old comfy croc.  Because it’s not making much of a fashion statement but it’s really amazingly good for your feet.  And bonus, it can also be crazy colours.

What is the strangest/weirdest thing you have ever eaten?

Muktuk, haggis and calamari.  Imagine having those three on your plate all at the same time.  I liked calamari just fine until finding out what it was.  Muktuk was smelly and disgusting.  Haggis was surprisingly not so bad.  But not good enough to want to ever have it again.

Optional Bonus question: What are you grateful for from last week, and what are you looking forward to in the week coming up?

Hmmm.  Laziness without guilt.  Or more laziness than usual with less quilt than normal.  My knee is fine but I’m still resting it to avoid re-injury.  This could go on for weeks.  I’ve cut back on the news because I think I finally reached my personal disbelief saturation level.  I baked muffins.  Amazingly enough that was less stressful for me than baking normally is.  More proof that the whole world has gone crazy.

I’m looking forward to getting lab work done (because I will be leaving the house to do it), renewing my passport (not going anywhere, it’s just expiring in April) and closing a bank account which has gone defunct from me ignoring it for two years.  If the balance had been higher than sixty seven dollars it might have interested me more.

Enjoy your Super Bowl Sunday!  I’ll be watching Netflix and eating muffins.

 

 

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Share Your World – January 23, 2017

Do you prefer juice or fruit?

I take medication (for Type II Diabetes) which helps my body deal with sugar.  I try to make its job easier by ingesting as little sugar as possible.  Fruit juice is deadly.  Natural sugars are still sugars, so I have to be careful with fruit too.  Thankfully I was never a big fan of juice (or all the other ways we mangle fruit) so I don’t miss it.  I do miss sitting down and eating a whole big bowl full of grapes though.

Did you grow up in a small or big town? Did you like it?

I grew up on a farm.  At the time I professed to not like it much at all.  Now that I’m older and wiser and living in a city I realize what an idyllic place it really was and how lucky we were to spend our childhood there.  But I would never go back.  Farms are a lot of work.  Plus there’s all that manure.

If you were to paint a picture of your childhood, what colors would you use?

All the colours.  Every last one of them.  Green trees, red barn, yellow brick house, brown garden dirt, blue skies, black and white cows, orange cats, purple lilacs, grey thunder clouds, pink spring blossoms, indigo nights.  Oatmeal coloured porridge.  Yuck.  Hey, it wasn’t ALL pretty.

Ways to Relax List: Make a list of what relaxes you and helps you feel calm.

• sharing my world, because it makes me remember
• making lists, so I won’t forget
• playing mindless (non memory) games on my iPad
• drinking coffee
• drinking red wine
• reading books
• drawing/sketching/painting
• binge watching whole seasons of tv shows on Netflix
• concentrating on nothing but breathing
• drinking more coffee
• reading myself to sleep

Optional Bonus question: What are you grateful for from last week, and what are you looking forward to in the week coming up?

Last week I mentioned the bag of marshmallows left over from Christmas baking and my intent to use them up by making Rice Krispy squares. I sent W on a puffed rice hunting expedition and he came home with the biggest box of cereal made anywhere in the world (just a guess, but geez…) so after I made the squares there was half a box of cereal left.  Then I asked him to get me another bag of marshmallows so I could use up the rest of the cereal.  He came home with TWO bags of marshmallows.  And thus we are back to our original state of one unused bag of marshmallows sitting in the cupboard.  I am not starting over.  They can stay there until next Christmas.

That little story really doesn’t have much to do with being grateful except for another interesting fact or two.  I gave most of the first batch of rice krispy squares to my daughter and granddaughter, but the second batch I have almost finished single- handedly consuming all by myself.  Yes I know I am being redundant in that sentence, but seriously, what is wrong with me.  W has ceased to be much help, perhaps feeling he has already done his part by purchasing ingredients.  Although I guess I should give him credit for bravely trying to finish up the brownies I was craving and made and which don’t interest me anymore because they are stale.  I really need to stop making stuff.

I am looking forward to dealing more satisfactorily with my random food cravings in the week coming up.  Or not.  Truthfully it’s something which just now popped in to my head and will no doubt pop out of it again.  Sometimes I think there’s no point in setting goals for myself at this stage of forgetfulness in my life.  I’m looking forward to winging it.  There, that one sounds attainable.

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Share Your World January 9,2017

If you lost a bet and had to dye your hair a color of the rainbow for a week, what color would it be?

If the choices were strictly red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo and violet,  I would go with red. Bright fire engine apple red.  So that people would stop and stare and make funny remarks about the crazy old lady with the flaming red hair.  But if it was ok to go with any hue you can come up with, I would much prefer pink, the colour of fluffy cotton candy. And maybe not quite so many startled exclamations from strangers.

If you could choose one word to focus on for 2017, what would it be?

Writing.  Or maybe Living.  I can’t decide. They are both things I am trying to focus on, but so far I’m doing my normal lackadaisical hit and miss break-taking job of both.  Nothing happens.  Then things happen that I don’t want to write about.  I have days where I would rather just obsess over them in silence.

Last week I learned of the death of a 67-year-old man I knew through work.  He died two days before Christmas, halfway through his work day.  I joked with him once about retiring, but he said he tried it briefly and got bored because his wife was still working so he came back.  Stories like this drive me nuts.  It’s like people decide to work themselves to death.  He was too old to be working and much too young to die.  And of course it is absolutely none of my business how anyone else chooses to exist.  Or ceases to exist in this lifetime.  Sometimes it makes me sad, and sometimes I think deceased people are lucky they won’t be around to face whatever happens next.  I know, it’s messed up.  I don’t want to talk about it.

What was one thing you learned last year that you added to your life?

I learned a whole lot about cleaning up and sprucing up and redecorating an old house.  Mostly I learned it’s a lot of work and I don’t ever want to do it again.  I also learned you should do it completely for yourself without trying to please anyone else.  It will just make you sad when the next people move in and decide to gut the place.  So I have added serenity.  I have subtracted mountains of clutter.  I have greatly simplified our next move.  If I die before then there’s way less crap for the living to sort through.

If life was ‘just a bowl of cherries’… which fruit other than a cherry would you be..?

A peach.  You have to work your way through the fuzzy skin to get to the good stuff.  Obviously I have no clue what this question means.

Optional Bonus question: What are you grateful for from last week, and what are you looking forward to in the week coming up?

I am grateful for my knee recovering from whatever its problem was.  I still walk around being cautious and aware of it, just in case.  And probably looking sneaky and weird in the process.

I am grateful for surviving a back-to-back full moon and Friday the 13th.  Although as many sources predict, next Friday could be infinitely more frightening.

Next week W goes for his one year follow-up on his hip replacement surgery.  Other than that madly exciting event, I’ve got nothing specific to anticipate.

More lists, though.  I’m not done with the lists. I will work on being slightly less morbid.  Yay for that, right?

 

More Please

What would you like more of this year?  Here’s  my list.

1. peaceful sound sleep
2. great coffee
3. good books
4. amazing sunrises
5. gorgeous sunsets
6. smiles
7. creativity
8. writing ideas
9. positive thoughts
10. laughter
11. daydreaming
12. fun
13. love
14. gratefulness
15. magic
16. healing
17. random acts of kindness
18. crazy (the good kind)
19. sunshine
20. joy

Gotta get going on this one.  Starting with coffee.  Wish me luck.

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Share Your World 2016 Week 38

Are you a hugger or a non-hugger?

I only hug back select people who get all weird and decide to hug me first. And by select people I mean close family and possibly extended family and maybe a friend or two but at the moment nobody in particular comes to mind. Random stranger hugging makes me extremely uncomfortable.  So I suppose that makes me a certified non hugger.  I prefer to comfort you and tell you I love you from across the room.

What is your least favorite Candy?

My current sugar phobia has me sworn off all things sweet and empty-caloried.  Most of it was pretty easy to give up, but perhaps especially toffee, or anything thick and chewy and capable of sucking the fillings out of your teeth.  I do miss milk chocolate, but I found some gluten free fudge bars that satisfy that craving when I’m weak enough to give in to it.  I won’t tell you how often that is because some things are private.

What’s the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word “fun”?

Family get-togethers with minimal hugging.  Sitting alone binge watching something on Netflix. Playing iPad games. Rearranging furniture.  Creating something, even if it’s basically useless.  Or maybe the useless part is what makes it fun.  Reading a good book.  Finding nothing but junk in the mail box, because junk is not bills.  Well, I’m pretty easily entertained, hey?

It’s also fun to be kind in a random spontaneous way when you’re out and about with a smile or a polite gesture or a helping hand.  Just don’t ruin it with hugging.  Gah.

List of Favorite Smells: What smells do you love? Whether it’s vanilla scented candles or the smell of coffee in the morning or the smell of a fresh spring rain…make a list of all the things you love for a little aromatherapy.

1.  Baby powder

2.  Sun tan lotion

3.  Cranberry Mandarin candles

4.  Clean sheets and towels dried on a clothes line on a sunny windy day.

5.  Cloves

The urge to write “coffee brewing” five times was strong.  I hope you appreciate this effort.

Bonus question: What are you grateful for from last week, and what are you looking forward to in the week coming up?

I am grateful to be breathing.  I look forward to keeping that going for awhile. Oh!  And Swiss Chalet!!  W is going to pick up some of that later.   Yay!  Roasted chicken is a pretty decent smell too.