Tag Archives: humor

Planning Ahead

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Just Jazzy 197

soap-lock (n) a lock of hair worn on the temple and kept smoothly in place by being soaped:  hence, any lock brushed apart from the rest of the hair and carefully kept in position.

sackbut (n) a medieval musical instrument of the trumpet family

"I wear my soap-lock on my forehead and play sackbut in a marching band!"  How totally awesome is that for an answer when somebody asks what you do?
“I wear my soap-lock on my forehead and play sackbut in a marching band!” How totally awesome is that for an answer when somebody asks what you do?

Jazzy Words

Float A Cornflake In It

The last couple of days I’ve been reading books, watching strange things on Netflix, copying weird stuff from Facebook and avoiding writing anything intelligent.  I can’t see why today should be any different.  So here’s some of the fruits of my labour.  Or lack thereof.

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Hope everybody is having a fantastic Tuesday!  Don’t work too hard!  In fact, if you can get away with it, don’t work at all.  I expect you won’t get any better advice than this from me and F. Scott  today.

“It was only a sunny smile, and little it cost in the giving, but like morning light it scattered the night and made the day worth living.” ―     F. Scott Fitzgerald

Never Too Busy

If you’re too busy to laugh, you’re too busy.  Personally I can’t remember the last time someone accused me of being too busy.  Or of never laughing.  Here’s some funny stuff (and shit)  gleaned from Facebook by me, while being extremely not busy.  Don’t say these bad words out loud.  In your head, it’s perfectly okay.

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Will the Real Me Please Stand Up

There was a little girl

Who had a little curl

Right in the middle of her forehead.

When she was good

She was very good indeed.

When she was bad, she was horrid.

(Henry Wadsworth Longfellow)

From Rarasaur and Prompts for the Promptless – Season 2 Episode 1:  The Alter Ego

The Alter Ego, in Latin, literally means “Second I” or “Second Self”.  It can refer to an opposite side to the personality within someone, or a counterpart like a trusted friend.

cheer challengedMy alter ego is such a bitch.  Angry, judgemental, sarcastic.  My exact polar opposite, really.  I am an angel of light, and she is a demon from hell.  For the sake of clarity let’s call her Cheer Challenged, or CC for short. You know, so that nobody gets confused and mixes us up.  Because she is not the real me.  I’m surprised you would think such a thing.

Most of the time I try to keep her bottled and caged, locked in a closet or stuffed under the bed,  because frankly she can be a pain in the ass to have around.  I have learned to keep her sedated and soothed with meditation and deep breathing, and by letting her know point-blank that nobody likes her scowly face and pissy attitude. She rants and complains, stamps her feet, rolls her eyes and sighs excessively.  She can hold a grudge for a very long time.  She is full of angst and ennui.  She is exhausting.

So why do I let CC stick around?  Why are there days when we face the world together, joined at the hip? Why do I apologize for her, time after time, feeling remorseful and guilty after little Miss Mad has been out to play?  A sane person would gag her with duct tape and drop her off a bridge.

Well here’s the thing.  I rather admire how her stubbornness makes her strong.  I want to agree with her when she announces that the world is full of idiots.  (Because holy crap, if that’s true, we fit right in.)  When she tries to curse and the swear words get all muddled and jumbled up and don’t make sense, it makes me laugh.  Her snit fits are usually brief, and always funny.  I think she is pretty smart, and insightful, and talented.  Sometimes her jokes are witty, sometimes they’re unkind, mostly they’re just plain hilarious.

CC will never let me nominate myself for sainthood.  We’re both too smart to think that could ever happen.  CC has mellowed and become less volatile over the years, but I think she will always be around, helping me see both sides of things, making sure I don’t take myself too seriously.

The truth is, there are times when I quite  like my dark side.  I embrace my inner bitch alter ego because she is interesting, a little crazy, and very human .

I’m okay, warts and all.  Just one of this earths idiots, trying to be very very good and a little less horrid every day.