Snorting Eucalyptus

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The view from where I’m sitting.  Yeah, I know.  Gives a whole new meaning to “still life”  

Yes, snorting eucalyptus IS what I’ve been doing for the past twenty-four days, which WP was kind enough to remind me is also how long it’s been since my last post.  Even W noticed this strange silence in November, the month in which we are supposed to be writing our little hearts out.  I did the polite Canadian thing and kept my comments about the American election more or less to myself, except for sharing a few news stories on Facebook.  That’s been pretty hard.  Are y’all batshit crazy down there??  Well I know you’re not, and have faith that sanity will prevail.  You know, before we all die hating each other.

In the summer I was blaming my stuffed up sinuses and chronic cough on seasonal allergies, but I’m not sure what the heck is going on now.  Rather than complain (and rewire my brain for negativity) (seriously, that’s an actual thing) I tried allergy pills and nasal sprays and decongestants, and elevated my blood pressure in the process.  So I ditched all that stuff, but I still wanted to breathe, so now I’m using my little air purifier even though there’s already an air purifier on our furnace.  Our air is PURE, man.  And I’m shooting a eucalyptus based spray up my nasal passages more than the recommended four times a day.  It does not cause rebound congestion and it works very well, for about twenty minutes.  Then it doesn’t anymore.

My hematologist said my chest was wheezy, and suggested I go back to my GP for an inhaler.  So that’s next.  I’ve had pneumonia.  I don’t want it again.  I keep running out of tissues.  My life is hell.  No of course it isn’t.

Other than wheezy breath I’m healthy enough I guess, because the hematologist said to come back in a year.  Her pre-screener gave me longer than that. I think.  The first thing he said to me was “…so, you’re sixty-seven, you’ve got another ten or twenty years to go.  Because, you know, eighties….” I did not know what the proper response was to that statement but probably because of the blank look on my face he quickly changed the subject and went on to other things.  Weirdo.

And speaking of weird, W said if I had nothing to write about I could always talk about him.  Wow.  He should NOT be encouraging that.

I never had much of a love for Christmas when I was growing up (too much church and  too many crazy relatives) (although the food was good), but when I met W his enthusiasm for the holiday was infectious.  He still absolutely loves Christmas.   He puts up the outdoor lights in mid November.  This year he added two spotlights which sit on the front lawn and flash revolving red and blue lights all over our house.  And the snow. And maybe the sky.  When I’m sitting in the living room they also flash all over the ceiling and the walls.  I told him it’s a good thing neither of us is prone to epileptic seizures and God help our neighbours if they are.  He didn’t find that even remotely funny.

Maybe my eucalyptus spritz is hallucinogenic.  Because he loves the lights.  He found out they are now on sale so I suggested he go get a couple more and the sarcasm was completely lost on him.

I wonder when my brain got rewired for sarcasm.  There’s probably a doctor for that, hey?

In other news, I put shelf liner in my cupboards this week.  Our washing machine (age 22 years) died a noisy death and has been replaced by a newer but amazingly similar model (but this one is water efficient, so there’s that) which cost less than the price of repairing the old one.  W also loves a bargain.

And I love my ordinary little life with a husband who thinks it’s funny that I find him funny.  There’s always something to be thankful for.  Like eucalyptus being a scent that kind of grows on you.  That’s a big one for sure.

Getting It Done in ’71

imageSet your time machines to November 20th, 1971 and let’s talk about going away outfits.  I’ve heard they’re supposed to be stylish and sophisticated and perfect, carefully chosen ensembles you wear for the last dance at your wedding reception before embarking on your romantic honeymoon and the beginning of your new life.

Does anyone even do those anymore?  I’m so out of touch with what goes on at weddings.  I was completely out of touch at my own.  It would have made me so happy to get married barefoot on the beach or to simply elope.  W was all for that too, but our  families were both big on tradition and we got swept up in the kerfluffle.  I’m pretty sure my mother and my mother-in-law did more sighing and eye rolling at my lack of interest than I noticed at the time.  They kept asking me questions even though they hardly ever liked my answers.

Things we didn’t get quite right –

  1. There was no engagement ring.  We couldn’t afford one and picked out inexpensive gold wedding bands instead.  I would have lost a diamond.  I lost my wedding band three times.
  2. There was no veil.  I made a hooded dress with braided silver trim.  It cost about twenty five dollars.  I wanted my sisters hooded dress to be deep purple, but they couldn’t find suitable material in that colour, so it was royal blue.  Close enough.
  3. There was no hairdresser.  By the time this picture was taken my self inflicted bouncy curls had bounced their last and I looked more or less back to normal.
  4. The best man (W’s brother) and the ushers (my brother and a friend) all had different coloured suits and shirts and ties and probably socks, for all I know, because we told them just to wear whatever they had.
  5. The flowers were artificial.  It was November.  There was freezing rain. We had a church ceremony, a church basement supper, and a get together at my family farm house after that.  The dance was a week later a thousand miles away with the grooms side of the family.
  6. We forgot to book a room somewhere, so spent our wedding night at my girlfriend and her husbands house after banging on their door and waking them up.  Good thing they both had a sense of humour.
  7.  We had no honeymoon, unless you count a two day drive from         my home town to his.

Oh, let’s just stop at lucky number seven, shall see? There’s lots more but this is getting depressing, and besides, I want you to look at those going away outfits!  I must have pulled some random thing out of my closet because my face is saying “I’m married!  I don’t care!”  And W is wearing his university blazer (that’s confetti, not dandruff) but it’s hard to focus on his clothes because of those sideburns!  I can’t even.  I’m sure you can’t either.  Proof that love is blind is all I can say about that.

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Weddings make me hungry.  Handbag under my arm, mouth full of cake, ready to blow this pop stand and set the world on fire.  Maybe starting with that brown and beige thing I’m wearing….

Sharing My World 39

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My November Day Twenty Nine

SHARE YOUR WORLD – 2015 WEEK #47

In your native language which letter or character describes you best? Why?

I closed my eyes and mentally recited the alphabet, calling on my spirit guides and muses for divine inspiration.  Or, you know, some such similar nonsense, because really, how else do you come up with an answer to this one?  My brain stopped on the letter “O”.  Some days my brain is very helpful, up to a point.

Just look at how versatile this letter is – it can be paired with any number of other words and things to convey the following:

  1. Dismay (with crap, damn and hell, accompanied by mournful sighs or deep groans)
  2. Surprise (with my gawd, really, and some high-pitched squealing)
  3. Confusion or disbelief (said with a question mark implied)
  4. Joy (with YES! ALRIGHT! HALLELUJAH! etc.)
  5. Understanding (as in O yeah, I get it! even when you don’t.)

Why does this describe me?  O….I don’t know.  Oh oh.  Oh phooey.  I am skipping that part.

What is your greatest extravagance?

Well it sure isn’t clothes.  Since I stopped working I have been wearing mostly yoga pants and flip flops and comfy tops with holes in them.  And everything has paint or glue or ink on it somewhere.

So my answer is art supplies, which will not be surprising to anyone who sees what I’m wearing.

Do you prefer exercising your mind or your body? How frequently do you do either?

My mind wants to do mental gymnastics at night when my body would prefer to sleep, so I have learned lots of ways to discourage it from thinking so much.  It is certainly good at dreaming up excuses during the day for my body to relax.  I like to think there is a good balance of both kinds of exercise in my life.  Liking to think such a thing does not, however, make it true.

List at least 5 things that make you laugh.

  1. Savage Chickens
  2. Little kids saying random swear words with no clue what they mean.
  3. John Cleese
  4. Baby goats
  5. Bridesmaids (the movie)

Bonus question: What are you grateful for from last week, and what are you looking forward to in the week coming up?

I am grateful for our amazing weather this sunny warm November.  It’s almost unheard of to shovel snow here only once in this usually godforsaken winter month.  Our son bought a new snowblower this year, so that’s probably why.

This week coming up I should be hearing from medical offices wanting to set up appointments for me.  What a dumb thing to look forward to. But I certainly am grateful for our incredible health care coverage, without which I would probably be sick and penniless and maybe even dead.

And on that pleasant note, Happy Grey Cup Sunday!  Go Eskimos!  Oh no, I won’t be watching the game, just enjoying the peace and quiet while W is downstairs glued to the big screen.  Oh yeah.

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Art du Jour 82

imageMy November Day Twenty Eight

There was a vision in my head before I started out on my little artistic adventure involving a grinning cat, but the result is not what I expected.

It never is.

I’m happy with the concept and I like the colours, but this had to sit on my easel for several days before it grew on me enough to share.

I suppose you can’t be madly in love with everything you do.
“I meant,” said Ipslore bitterly, “what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?”
Death thought about it.
CATS, he said eventually. CATS ARE NICE.”
― Terry Pratchett, Sourcery

 

A Spot of Busy

I was so excited to buy this coconut almond butter! It's yummy! Jury still out on the butternut squash until we see what I might do to the poor thing.

I was so excited to buy this coconut almond butter! It’s yummy! Jury still out on the butternut squash until we see what I might do to the poor thing.

My November Day Twenty Seven

Before this month gets away on me completely I will squish in a few more posts.  Well, this one, anyway, let’s not get overly optimistic just yet.  Believe what you may, but I’m here to tell you I have been BUSY!

Yes, I am shouting.  I so rarely get to say that word.

W is three weeks and three days post hip replacement surgery and although he still likes to be waited on, he really has become quite independent again.  He is able to sit for short periods in normal chairs, goes up and down the basement stairs with his crutches, gets himself in and out of the shower without help.  Yesterday I drove him in his truck to the bank and the gas station and at both places he was all self-serve.  I changed vehicles to do the grocery shopping and was SO ready to give him complete hell for using the snowblower while I was gone, but it turns out a friend came over to blow the big snow bank I shovelled along the edge of the driveway into the back yard.  Yes we have snow, and yep, I shovelled the whole damned driveway.  Hard on the shoulders but good for the glucose readings.  I could learn to use the snowblower but I’m sure I’d never do it right according to the snow blower king I’m living with, so for now we will just let ignorance be bliss.

Speaking of those pesky worrisome little blood sugar reading numbers, did you know stress can make them higher?  I finally went to have my pelvic ultrasound done on Wednesday so the lab could see what this “mass” above the uterus might be.  The first ultrasound had to be done with me having a full bladder.  You don’t know the true meaning of discomfort until someone presses hard on your full bladder.  Or the true meaning of weird until you’ve had an internal ultrasound.  I don’t even want to talk about that part.  I started to tell W about it and he looked a little ill.

These lab tests were done at 3:00 in the afternoon.  The doctor’s office called me at 9:00 the next morning to come in and discuss the results. I love my doctor, but she also scares the hell out of me, sending me for tests and finding things out and wanting to discuss it all with me immediately.  She and the radiologist believe what I have is a fibroid of some sort, but now I need to have MRI testing to see it properly.  I believe fibroid issues are about the least alarming thing one can have going on down there.

I used to wonder why old people talked so much about medical conditions and tests and operations and health concerns, but it is a mystery no more.

One of my favourite former coworkers dropped by for coffee this week!  It was lovely of her to take the time on her day off to come and see me. Somehow we let six months slip away from us without even saying hello.  Lots of catching up to do in one short morning.  If there’s one thing I miss about work, it’s the great friendships that are forged.

That same day I was visited by a nice lady named Ping from the faculty of nursing because I agreed to participate in a U of A study called “A Client-Driven Intervention to Support Self-Management Among Community-Living Older Adults with Type 2 Diabetes and Multiple Chronic Conditions”.  I don’t know yet if I will be in the control group which basically does nothing, or the intervention group which has to attend group wellness sessions.  Guess which group I would most like to end up in.

If nothing else, perhaps I will find out what my other multiple chronic conditions are, and get the promised $25.00 gift certificate for some as yet undisclosed grocery store.  Fun times.  It’s been a long time since I’ve been paid for doing something.  Or nothing.

The good habits I’ve been working on are not yet set in stone.  Notice the lack of daily November posts as an example.  It’s time to get back to the daily walks, since the weather is quite nice and the trampoline nonsense is proving to be a poor substitute.  My food journaling and blood sugar testing have also been hit and miss.

But we did manage to have our daughter and granddaughter over for a long promised fish dinner.  W brings back as much frozen fish (pickerel/walleye) from camp as he’s allowed.  It’s not as good as fresh, but still delicious.

Now that I’ve explained my busy-ness, it no longer sounds so busy in writing as it did in my head.  There was a lot of food prep and laundry in there.  And game playing and Netflix watching and sleeping.  And even a bit of house cleaning.  Okay, not a lot of that last one.

And now that yet another day in my life is half gone and there’s only about four hours of daylight left (I wish I was kidding, this time of year is so depressing when we hardly have time to notice the sun) I will now  attempt to make some sense of my cluttered disorganized multi tasking area formerly known as the art studio.  Or maybe I will walk first.  Or make W some lunch.  The possibilities, as usual, are not exactly endless even if I sometimes think otherwise.

To conclude this rambling mess of information, here are some comforting horoscope predictions.  I only ever record the good bits.

Material life will be without any concerns and even very comfortable, but risk of problems concerning inheritances and successions. (haha! Like we are royalty or something).

Don’t let your minor health problems worry you too much; take all the necessary precautions to put a halt to them, but don’t turn this issue into an obsession. You’ll be able to adapt yourself and make the most of the changes that will occur.

Be careful of overwork and its damaging consequences; certainly, you’ll want to do well, but your resistance will be declining, and you’d better slow down your pace temporarily; sleep more.

Your daily humdrum routine’s going to experience a small pleasant upheaval. 

May all your upheavals be small and pleasant ones.

Sharing My World 38

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Image from Wikipedia – Gummi Candy

My November Days…..which I have missed up to and including Seventeen….using the new and improved no beep-bop-boop posting system while half-assed listening to a detailed weather report by the infamous W.  Because weather.  It’s what we live for.

Share Your World 2015 Week 46

What type of popular candy do you not like to get?

I don’t like to get any candy, but I especially don’t like to get gummy or gummi anything – bears, worms, bottles, frogs, body parts, smurfs, and whatever other weird shapes they make that chewy jelly stuff into to entice candy consumers. I never liked jelly beans as a kid, except for that time we had red ones and I tried to dispose of my red vitamin pill in the jelly bean bag.  I was caught red-handed by my dad who thought it was funny.  Mother was less amused.

What do you feel is the most enjoyable way to spend $500?

Eating out ten times.  I love it when somebody else cooks and serves and cleans up the mess.

Where do you eat breakfast?

These days, in the living room.  W still needs his special chair so serving his meals where the chair and high computer table are is easier than constantly moving things around.  So I eat there too.  Getting breakfast-y fingerprints all over my iPad screen.

Would you rather ride one of the worlds longest zip lines or bungee jump one of the highest in the world? This will come with a 5-day all expense vacation.

I would rather shoot myself in the foot than try either one of those things.  Sometimes I think vacations are completely wasted on me when I am just as happy staying home where our old clothes line has no zip to speak of and probably won’t kill us.

Bonus question: What are you grateful for from last week, and what are you looking forward to in the week coming up?

Yesterday W had his 32 staples removed from the hip replacement surgery incision.  I didn’t hear much screaming.  In fact I didn’t hear any at all, leading me to believe they carry out these procedures in sound proof rooms.  He is now held together with butterfly closures and I am no longer required to change his dressing every day.  He is two weeks today post surgery and doing well.

What am I looking forward to in the week coming up?  I don’t know, maybe it’s bad luck to peer that far into the uncertain future.  As long as there are no bungee jumps or zip lines to contend with we should be fine.

Next up, chilli that’s been simmering for a couple of hours served in the living room.  It’s not five hundred bucks worth of dining out, but close enough.

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