Not Quite Right

 

Hey! It's the Christmas Witch Doctor!

Hey! It’s the Christmas Witch Doctor!

If I am boring myself enough with all my health related thoughts that I can’t stay awake to write them down, then there isn’t much chance that anyone else will find them gripping.  Or helpful.  Thus my procrastination when it comes to ending this blog-neglect thing I have going on.

But I seriously have NOTHING much else happening in my life just now.

Except maybe for Facebook where I read this little story about a nurse who was bathing her patient when he asked her, “Are my testicles black?”   So she checked them out for him and reassured him that everything looked just fine down there.

“Well, that’s great,” he said, “But what I asked you was ARE MY TEST RESULTS BACK?”

This is a perfect example of how I hear things, all mangled up and misconstrued and just not quite on the money.  W requested the other day from another room that I put play dough on the grocery shopping list.  That’s what I heard.  I think it could have been bagels or maybe Leggo.  I don’t know.

And when I went for more needle biopsies on my neck last week (follow-up from a year ago in case there are changes) the doctor told me when he was finished to keep the band-aid on for fifty hours.  That sounded odd, so I wondered if maybe he meant fifteen hours, but that seemed a strange time frame too.  A few hours??  Then he went on to talk about pain killers and results and another visit and I had to pay attention to all that so I forgot to ask for clarification on the band-aid issue.  I took it off when it started to itch.  I am still alive.

Whenever I ask W to repeat himself he gets annoyed and on my case about getting a hearing aid.  But I don’t want one yet.  And here are some of the reasons why I’m being stubborn about it.

  1.  I have inherited my dads intolerance for noise.  He didn’t like the television or the radio blaring away either.  Or people who shouted when they talked.  Or a lot of different types of racket going on at once.  He liked peace and quiet.  Me too.
  2. At night I can still hear clocks ticking and faucets dripping and dogs barking and husbands snoring.  I’d like to get deaf enough to NOT hear those things.  Then we’ll talk.  And I won’t be able to even wildly guess what you’re telling me, so won’t that be fun?
  3. When I was an optician I found people in denial about their need for progressive lenses to be the most apt to dislike them and not adapt to wearing their new multi focal glasses.  I’ve heard it’s the same with hearing aids.  I don’t want to spend all that money on something until I’m sure I need it and really want it and will wear it and like it.  The option of being able to turn it off at will is certainly appealing.
  4. Part of my hearing “problem” is no doubt my inability to pay attention.  My mind wanders off on tangents.  I zone out.  Teachers often remarked about how much time I spent day dreaming.  I’m still doing it.  Sorry, did you say something?
  5. The things I hear are often way funnier than the things actually being said.  Who would want to give that up?

So, how do you like my new lazy Christmas decorating method where you don’t take anything ordinary away but simply add some holiday stuff to the junk you already have lying around?  Whoa, Martha’s got nothing on me.  If you’re disagreeing with that, I can’t hear you.

Nothing says Peace quite like an alien giraffe.

Nothing says Peace quite like an alien giraffe.

Sharing My World 36

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It’s a black and white world out there today….

Share Your World 2015 Week  43

If you were on a debate team, what general subject would you relish debating?

If I were on a debate team, the rest of the team would kick me off.  I do not relish debating of any kind.  I don’t like to listen to people argue and it makes me uncomfortable when opposing views lead to heated exchanges.  I am blessed/cursed with being able to see both sides of the story.  This is not to say I don’t have informed (and in some cases no doubt misguided) opinions about things, but I rarely feel the need to shove my beliefs down someone else’s throat.  I am the peacekeeper, planted firmly on the fence.

What’s your strongest sense?

Well it sure isn’t my hearing.  Another reason why debating is not my thing.  I would misinterpret the arguments and call the opposite side idiots.  I don’t think you get points for that.

My sense of smell is pretty good.  Especially if something is burning, I’m likely to notice it before anyone else does.

What would you name the autobiography of your life?

Blessed and Cursed:  My Life on the Fence

List your favorite flavors or types of tea.

I don’t like to be all negative in a post, but I hate tea even more than I hate debating.  It doesn’t matter how you try to dress it up with different flavours, it’s still tea.  I quite like teapots though.  Not everything about tea is bad.

Bonus question: What are you grateful for from last week, and what are you looking forward to in the week coming up?

I am grateful for my appointment with the Primary Care nurse and for all the information and advice she gave me about diabetes.  She drew on a white board with dry erase markers (this appealed to the artist in me I guess) pictures of the liver, the pancreas, and a big fat blood cell or artery or something.  Glucose was represented by little red X’s and insulin by little green triangles.  Then there were many arrows pointing in every which direction.  Now I understand why my fasting blood sugar readings are consistently high in the morning even though I have not been sleep walking/eating during the night.

Activity and weight loss are the magic words here, along with the medication which is supposed to make my liver and pancreas less confused.  The nurse had more medically relevant terminology for the process.  I am really starting to enjoy my walks now, since they involve less huffing and puffing and gasping and cursing under my breath.  Or lack thereof.  And I have changed my eating habits so that I eat all three meals and two snacks, so it feels like I’m doing nothing but eating all day long.  This makes not eating anything after 6:00 p.m. a piece of cake.  So to speak.

W has his hip surgery next week.  Both of us will be grateful to have that behind us.

Oh yeah….Halloween is tomorrow.  W bought enough mini chocolate bars to last us for the next six Halloween nights.  He says it is because he hates to run out, although I’m not sure how he knows what that feels like because we NEVER run out.  Ever.

Amazingly enough I have not been tempted by them.  My taste buds are not grateful for that, but I’m pretty sure my liver is.

Happy Halloween (in case I don’t make it back here tomorrow to say that).   Hope you’ve had a great week.

share-your-world2

Three Quotes: The Beginning

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 “You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars. In the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul.”
Max Ehrmann

Thanks Laura Bruno Lily  for this fun challenge – Three Quotes in Three Days.  I not only accepted the challenge, but decided I would also play by the rules!  Must be something in the air.

The rules of the challenge are:

1) Thank the person who nominated you.
2) Post a quote each day for 3 days.
3) Each day nominate 3 new bloggers to take part.

This is now your mission, if you choose to accept it.  If you don’t, we will put it behind us and never speak of it again.

Eileen at Laughter: Carbonated Grace

Pam at Catching My Drift

Alice at coffee and a blank page

 

 

Hippie Speak

Dad, I’m leaving town for a few days, remember?  We talked about this last night.  You going to be okay here on your own while I’m gone?

Yeah, that’s copasetic.  Far out.  Righteous, babe.

So you’re telling me you understand what I’m saying to you? Or we can go over it again if you want.

Hey, don’t freak out. Chill. I ain’t trippin’. Lay it on me.

It’s just a short business trip. I’ll be back on Friday.  I’ve left the name of the hotel where I’m staying and the phone number if you need to reach me. It’s all here on the counter.

Wicked. I’m cool. I dig it.  I can hang loose.  Nice threads, by the way.  You are all decked out.

Thanks – I didn’t think you’d notice. It’s a little more colour than I’m used to. You’re serious, I look good?

You look bitchin’.  Right on!  Boss!  Groovy! Clean outa sight!

Good Gawd.  Too much weed Dad.  You are so stuck in the sixties.  It’s just weird.

I’m a fascinating dude, a real gone cat.  I cannot lie.  Blitzed or not I am always hep.

Okay, whatever.  I’ve got a plane to catch.  There’s lots of food in the fridge. Make sure you eat.  Millie next door says she can pick up anything you need, you just have to ask. She’ll be by to check on you.  Please don’t burn the house down while I’m gone.

No sweat. Don’t get hacked.  You can split.  Go ape.  Have a blast.

Right. The cab is here, I’m off. Catch you on the flip side, daddy-o.

Oh man, hey, that’s my girl!  Later baby.  Peace, out.

peace out

trifecta button

Trifecta Challenge Week 109: It was interesting to look at all the new words that officially came into
existence during the last year. Unfortunately, they are so new they haven’t had
chance to get a third definition yet. But after delving into a list of new words
and meanings which have come into English over the last fifty years, you can see
many old words have changed their meaning. There are some crackers. And one of
them is your Trifecta 109 prompt.  Enjoy!

WHATEVER
1.   (pronoun)
a: anything or everything that
b: no matter what : regardless of
what
Used in questions that
express surprise or
confusion
2.   (adjective) a: all
the
b: any ; any … that
Used to refer to something that is not
known
3.   (adverb) Used to show that something is not important

Just Jazzy 189

“And so this is Christmas…what have you done?”
― John Lennon

“Peace on earth will come to stay, When we live Christmas every day.”

― Helen Steiner Rice

Have yourself a Merry Little Christmas.

Have yourself a Merry Little Christmas.

 

“What do you think of Christmas?” “I like it,” she said. “I think we should have it every year.” ―     Liz Flaherty     One More Summer