One Liner Wednesday – Insufferable

 

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When you get an idea in your head, you simply won’t let it go as you constantly search for normalcy, love, and sometimes revenge–and your vicious stubbornness inspires you to fight to the death to get what you want.

One-Liner Wednesday

(I took the female action hero personality test on brainfall and the above is my result.  I am the bride.  I had never heard of her before today.  One of the questions on the quiz asked why you were taking the test, with ‘I’m insufferably bored’ as one of the choices.  Turns out I’m also insufferably stubborn, but I’m sure it’s in a good way.  Don’t make me fight you to the death over the truth in that.)

 

Everybody Should Have One of These Things

Early this morning I drove over to the mall and had my hair cut.  Every time this happens I manage to have a mild anxiety attack, but this time I’ll spare you the details.  It’s hair.  It will grow.  I must enjoy this process, because I keep repeating it.  The salon I went to is right next to Chapters and Starbucks, so it’s no great surprise that I spent another hour there searching for ways to get rid of even more money.

I got stuck in the Self Help section looking at books which want to teach me how to be happy.  And happier. And smarter and richer and more successful and focused and content and gawd only knows what else – I never made it to the bottom shelf.  I actually hate the bottom shelf and think everything in there should be placed at eye level for people like me who don’t feel like bending over.  If there was a book down there with advice on how to get over being so damned lazy I didn’t see it.

There is a happiness quiz in one of the books I decided to bring home with me.  If I pass that with flying colors I suppose I won’t have to read the rest of it. And without any advice at all I managed to buy something that has already made me very happy for inexplicable reasons.

It’s a desktop gargoyle.  I have never had a gargoyle before and until this morning I had no idea that I needed one.  Having inch long spiked up hair no longer matters.  The little book that comes with it says he will protect me from evil spirits and act as a warning to potential evil-doers.  It suggests I should get ready for an exciting life alongside my new beloved fiery-eyed friend.

Even without his eyes lit up he’s pretty impressive.  Available at Chapters.  If there are any more demented shoppers like me out there, these will be gone before you know it.  So get out there and get one NOW.