I have a big mouth and a terrible habit of talking about people when they’re not around, being sarcastic and rude, and pointing out all the things I find infinitely irritating and stupid.
It’s a nasty job, but somebody’s gotta do it.
I really and truly try to stop myself from being negative and judgemental. Especially when in the grand scheme of things it makes no difference what I think. Often the person I’m blathering away to couldn’t care less. So why do I do it? It doesn’t make anything better. It often makes a bad situation worse.
Before I start talking I try to imagine if I would ever say such a thing if the person in question could hear me. If the answer is NO, then I know it’s time to shut up.
Shut up and listen! Must have been my parents who gave me that advice, and it’s definitely good for anybody who wants to learn anything and can actually pull it off for a couple of minutes.
I expect to truly know what was the BEST advice I ever received I’d have had to, at some point in my life, actually listened to what preachy people were saying to me. And then it would probably have been a good idea to act on that counsel in one way or another to test it out and discover if it was good or bad or just plain stupid. Could be that my biggest problem is never asking for anyone’s opinion, (being so very busy expressing my own) and thus I fear I might not recognize good advice if I tripped over it.
If I dig down really deep I think I do remember someone saying to me when I was little that I should do what I knew in my heart to be the right thing. Just go with those gut feelings. Trust and believe in yourself. No one knows you better than you know yourself and no one has to live with your conscience if you screw up royally except YOU.
I’m hoping that’s the reason why I don’t pay any attention to people who think they know what’s best for me, and that it’s not just some obstinate stubborn streak and a strong aversion to being told what to do. And even if it is, I’m never going to admit it.
So I guess that’s it – ultimately it’s pretty simple. Do what makes you happy. Nobody but you can figure out what that is.
And if you’re foolish enough to ask me for MY advice, well. Please, sit down, shut up, and start listening.