Really Snow White

This reminded me of a funny story which I’ve told before.

But this is what old people do – we repeat things and don’t give a shit if you’ve heard them all twenty-six times already.

Granddaughter (the first) and I were sitting on the couch playing with her Polly Pocket dolls.  She was responsible for the actions and deeds and commentary of three or four of them, but I had just one.  I chose Snow White because she’s my favourite.  I had her climb to the top of the couch-back where she jumped around, lost her wig, put it on backwards, freaked out because she couldn’t see, and screamed for help.

My granddaughter sighed, rolled her eyes, and said in her firmest no-nonsense 4-year-old voice, “Oh Snow White, get a grip of yourself.”

Snow White made less of an ass of herself after that.

Here’s to the last snow white day in January.  And getting a grip when we need to.

Once Upon a Time

Because of a personality flaw which makes me susceptible to various (mostly harmless) addictions, I’ve been lost in the enchanted forest and the town of Storybrooke, Maine for days and days.  I’m blaming it on Netflix.  I rarely watch television because of all the wasted minutes in life which are spent enduring commercials, but put a good series of shows together back to back with no interruptions, and I am hooked.

Once Upon a Time is a jumbled up mess of worlds and fairy tales and elusive happy endings.  The best stories always start with those four words, don’t you think?  That was my absolute favourite beginning to any narrative when I was a child, and I loved to add more details and adventures and complications to make the bed time story go on and on.  They lived happily ever after was always put off for as long as I could keep my eyes open.  And then after that on into my dreams. I don’t think I’ve entirely grown up yet.

It started off with mild curiosity and pressing play on episode one.  Then on to the next episode and the next and the next, until suddenly it was midnight and my head had turned into a pumpkin full of magic beans and I did not want this amazing fairy tale to end.  It is well written and it is well-played.  A lot of the casting seems magically inspired.

By sitting glued to my I-Pad lately, (that is every waking moment I’m not interrupted by tiresome things like going to work), I have managed to make it well into the middle of season two. For every resolved problem there are inevitably two or three new ones that pop up, and now ‘happily ever after’ appears to be everyone’s never-ending quest.  Kind of like real life when you think about it.  Eventually you realize happiness is all in the joy of the hunt and the experiences, and not in the outcome you thought you wanted after all.

It’s never time wasted if you learn something, right?  So here’s what I’ve learned so far.

1.  Sometimes you do the right thing for the wrong reason, and sometimes you do the wrong thing for the right reason.  Either way, shit is bound to happen. 

2.  Magic beans create portals to different worlds.  You can also use wishing wells, magic top hats and enchanted wardrobes. And possibly various other things as long as they’re sprinkled with sufficient amounts of fairy dust. 

3.  Not everyone who is bad is bad to the bone.  If you look deep enough you will discover their redeeming qualities.

4.  Powerful curses can be broken.

5.  Always be careful what you wish for and how you wish for it.  When you get it, you might discover that what you said wasn’t really what you meant at all.

6.  Magic always comes with a price. 

7.  Snow White was not just another pretty face. 

8.  People who mean well can generally screw things up just about as fast as those who wish you harm.

9.  When Snow White and Prince Charming are your grandparents on your mother’s side, your other grandfather is a powerful wizard of dark magic and you’ve been adopted by the wicked queen, guess what.  Your life is going to be pretty weird.

10.  Everyone has a story.

Be warned, once you start watching this series it may be very difficult to stop.  It sucks the real life ambition right out of you and glues you to your couch where you will sit mesmerized as if time is standing still.  Chances are, you won’t even try to escape until the story ends.

Snow White and the Huntsman Movie Night

On Tuesday night I was all set to watch this movie after work, but the DVD wouldn’t play!  So I had to take it back and exchange it for another one.  The customer service person told me it was possible they got a ‘bad batch’ of the movie, and if the exchanged one also didn’t work, my next move should be to take it back to a different store where they were more likely to have a ‘good batch’.  At that point I began to question how much I really needed to see the damned thing.  I mean the movie sleeve shows an angst ridden Kristen Stewart looking glum, Chalize Theron all poised and gorgeously, wickedly evil, and a hatchet wielding Chris Hemsworth ready to kill somebody.  Or something.  That part isn’t clear.  But really, I already know the story, right?

Well not really.  The second DVD worked just fine, and I was pleasantly surprised by some of the delightful twists and turns as I watched it last night.  But here’s the most delightful thing of all – Kristen Stewart.  Give the girl kudos for this one.  She is good.  And she almost smiles a couple of times.  Even though she sees her dead father with a bloody knife embedded in his heart and is locked up in the north tower of the castle for half  of her young life, escapes to the perils of the dark forest, and has her life saved by one of the dwarves when he sacrifices his own for her.  Then there’s the small matter of her heart being a big part of the wicked queens quest for immortality.  There is not a lot to smile about.

I love the fact that it’s not the prince who breaks the poisoned apple spell.  If that’s a spoiler, sorry.  And the ending isn’t exactly happily ever after either, but you get the feeling that it’s a definite possibility.

And then there’s this – beautiful and haunting music to go with a rather sad part.

 

Maybe you won’t be blown away by this movie as the sleeve suggests, but I don’t think you’ll be unmoved by it either.  There’s some incredibly beautiful bits and some excellent special effects.  For lots of reasons,  I want to watch it all over again.

Magical Fruit

Now that I’ve got this picture taken and posted, I’m kind of at a loss for words.  It seemed like a good idea at the time.  An apple with a weird stripe.  Another with a strange pattern.  Even Snow White after recovering from her traumatic choking episode would be tempted by these two I think.  My one and only grandma award, although I don’t remember who else was in the competition.  And a jar of magic beans.  I can’t say for certain what kind of magic the beans are capable of because I’ve had them for years and never gotten around to planting them to find out.  I’m sure magic doesn’t have a best before date and only improves with age.

It is the 2nd last day of January and I have posted every single day of this month so far.  One day to go.  And then a mere eleven months after that.  This post a day thing has been much much harder than I thought it would be but for once in my life I’m going to actuallly carry on doing something stupid for no good reason other than because I said I would.  Or is that exactly what I’ve been doing my entire life?  I can’t remember and I don’t know.  But here’s one of those 365 project pictures I promised would probably pop up when my head was drained and emptied of better ideas.  And thus and so I shall carry on carrying on.