Tag Archives: weird

Weird Things

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(from Facebook, not sure who to credit, but somebody deserves a lot of it)

I don’t remember where this list came from, but “weird things about me” is a prompt I found hard to resist.  Is that weird?

I suppose the real weird part is having it sit in my drafts folder for six months.  So “hard to resist” may not mean what I think it means.  Anyway, here you go.  Feel free to copy and paste the questions so we can compare weirdness.
1.  Do you like blue cheese?

Absolutely cannot get past the appearance and smell to put it in my mouth.  So I guess that means no.

2. Coke or Pepsi?

Not sure (in a blind taste test)  if I’d be able to tell the difference.  I think I prefer Pepsi but I’ve been buying Coke Zero.  A lot of things in my life are confusing like that.

3. Do you own a gun?

Nope.  Although there’s still a couple of shot guns in the house from W’s trap shooting days, complete with permits.  They are locked away, separate from ammunition.  We are good law-abiding Canadians who will have to fend off intruders with kitchen knives and random blunt objects.  I don’t really have a clear plan.

4. What flavor Kool-aid?

Never touch the stuff.  Raspberry Crystal Lite is pretty good.  I prefer making my own lemon water with Truvia.

5. What do you think of hot dogs?

I think it’s bizarre that white bread with mystery meat and a pile of condiments can taste so good.

6. Favorite tv show?
7. Favorite movie?

I refuse to answer questions containing the word “favourite” especially when it’s spelled incorrectly.

8. What do you drink in the morning?

Water to swallow daily meds and coffee to improve my disposition.

9. Can you do a push-up?

Not likely.

10. Favorite jewelry?
11. Favorite hobby?

Leave me alone.

13. Do you wear glasses?

Yes, when I’m driving.  Otherwise I squint a lot at things in the distance and may appear to be rude and stuck up when I don’t recognize your face at twenty paces and ignore you.

14. Favorite cartoon character?

Cartoons are stupid.

15. Three things you did today?

Went to our accountants office to sign some papers.  Ate a McDonalds breakfast.  Whipped off an email to my baby sister to wish her a happy birthday and let her know her card will be late because I’m a procrastinating moron.  That last part she knows already so I didn’t have to actually point it out.

16. Three drinks you drink regularly?

Coffee. Times three.  And LOTS of water if that counts.

17. Current worries?

Why is life so expensive?  That’s about it.

18. Current hates?

Politics.

19. Favorite place to be?

Home.  Drinking coffee.

20. How did you ring in the new year?

Blissfully unconscious.  Probably snoring.

21. Where would you like to go?

Back to Ontario.

22. Favorite color?

Red. COLOUR.  I know, I’m being anal.

23. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets?

No clue.  But the slipperiness might be weird.

24. Can you whistle?

Very badly.  One barely audible note.

25. Where are you now?

On the couch in my living room. From here I can observe the approach of intruders, assuming they choose to gain access through the front door.

26. Would you be a pirate?

Probably not a very good one.  Not a fan of ships and oceans.  Or looting or swords.

27. Favorite food?

Not blue cheese.

28. What’s in your pockets?

Air and lint.

29. Last thing that made you laugh?

The news.  It also sometimes makes me cry.  And the picture at the top of this post. OMG the look on that cats face.

30. Favorite animal?

Stop it.  Okay, it’s that cat.

31. What’s your most recent injury?

I have a huge bruise on my left leg at the knee.  Must have bumped in to something.  Can’t give you any more details than that.

32. How many tv’s in your house?

One.

33. Worst pain ever?

Crushed disc in my lower back pushing on a nerve.  I spent about eight months on muscle relaxants and pain killers before surgery to remove it.  That’s how long it took to get a proper diagnosis.

34. Do you like to dance?

Not. At. All.  Because AWKWARD.

35. Are your parents still alive?

No.  I miss them.

36. Do you enjoy camping?

No.  Camping is even more stupid than cartoons.

Happy Thursday!  If it’s your birthday today the card from me is gonna be late, sorry!

This all ended up considerably less weird than I expected.  I’ll try to do better next time.

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This, That, or the Other Thing

Peacock, Giraffe or Glass of something bubbly? Decisions, decisions....
Peacock, Giraffe or Glass of something bubbly? Decisions, decisions….

The game of “This or That” can be extremely frustrating with its limited choices, don’t you think?   I find myself considering the two things and thinking ‘well, it depends…’ and wishing there were a third option.  So I made up my own game with the addition of ‘other’.

  1. Pancakes/Waffles/Crêpes Suzette
  2. Truth/Dare/Don’t Even Ask
  3. Stripes/Polka Dots/The Family Tartan Plaid
  4. White Wine/Red Wine/Double Harvey Wallbanger
  5. Black Coffee/Coffee with Cream and Sugar/Triple Venti Half Sweet Non Fat Caramel Macchiato
  6. Drive/Fly/Hot Air Balloon
  7. Jogging/Hiking/Sky Diving
  8. Ferris Wheel/Roller Coaster/Drop of Doom
  9. Gift Wrap/Gift Bag/Gift Card in a Plain White Envelope
  10. Dogs/Cats/Pygmy Goats
  11. Baby Doll/Teddy Bear/Voodoo Doll
  12. Make a Plan/Be Spontaneous/Fly by the Seat of Your Pants
  13. Roller Skates/Roller Blades/Roller Derby
  14. Phone Call/Text/Hand Written Note on Expensive Stationery
  15. Marathon/Sprint/Watching it all on TV
  16. Doctor/Dentist/Holistic Naturopath
  17. Cake/Pie/Brazilian Chocolate Brigadeiro
  18. See the Future/Change the Past/Live in the Moment
  19. Singer/Dancer/Circus Acrobat
  20. Piano/Guitar/Bagpipes

The purpose of these questions is supposedly getting to know someone, so let’s take it a step further and conduct a scientific analysis, like they do in those quizzes on Facebook.

If you picked mostly first answers, you are pretty predictable and, let’s face it, rather boring.  However, you are also calm, careful and charismatic.  (It’s always best to say something nice in these conclusions so people won’t hate your quiz and call it garbage.)

If you picked mostly second answers it means you take the time to consider the options and don’t just grab on to the first thing that pops up.  You are adventurous, warm-hearted and optimistic.  Seriously, your answers did indicate all that, I didn’t just make it up.

If the majority of your answers were of the ‘other’ variety, holy moly, you are just plain weird.  And by that I mean imaginative, mysterious and bordering on brilliant.  But mostly just plain weird.

Well, this nonsense is making me want to go take some REAL Facebook quizzes and find out who I was in another life and what kind of chocolate I most resemble based on my zodiac sign.  Important stuff.

Hope your Saturday is enlightening and fun.  But mostly fun. With a little weird thrown in.

Sharing My World 42

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SHARE YOUR WORLD – 2015 WEEK #50

Favourite thing to photograph? Write? Or Cook?

I like to photograph my art work in different lights and mess around editing the colours.  Then I can see things that need fixing.  Isn’t that weird?  You would think flaws would be easier to see in real life rather than on a screen.  I also like to take pictures of the outside from the inside, i.e. my back and front yards through the windows.   That is also weird, but I expect the novelty will wear off soon.  Well let’s hope so anyway.  Lately it’s my jungle themed Christmas.  See above for clarification.  Or consternation, your choice.

Obviously I enjoy writing about myself, I do so much of it, and that probably will never get old for any of us, because what else do we know more about?  Or less about and are still trying to write it all down to figure it out?   Poetry (even if it’s bad) is fun and challenging, but I haven’t written any for a long time.  And short stories are as ambitious as my fiction gets.  I don’t think I have the attention span to write anything longer.

There is nothing I LIKE to cook.  The only reason I do it at all is to keep myself from starving to death.

Did you like swinging as a child? Do you still get excited when you see a swing?

Yes, I loved swinging as a child!  No, I don’t get excited when I see swings these days because they’re never old tires tied to thick ropes dangling from real trees!  Now that’s exciting.  Dad made those for us as well as the kind with big fat board seats.  And here’s another weird thing.  Kids twisting themselves around and around until the swing ropes are super tight and then letting themselves go to spin back in the other direction until they’re so dizzy they could puke.  Best fun ever.  Second best fun for us was going as high as we could go until we were at the peak of the forward swing and then jumping off into nothing but blue sky.  We wanted to see who could travel the greatest distance and marked our landing spots in the dirt with a stick.  My brother always won that one, no contest.  The last time we played it he also broke his arm.

What has surprised you about blogging?

How much I like people!  Well, that came out wrong.  How connected I feel to so many different bloggers from so many different places, who have lives so very different from mine.  And yet we are alike.  It’s a beautiful thing.  So many people with so many stories to tell, so many friends I’ve never met but have come to know and love and look forward to hearing from every day.  And when they’re not around I miss them.

List at least five favorite desserts.

Well what a thing to ask of a newly diagnosed diabetic.  Three months ago if I thought about it at all, I imagined diabetics were people who ate entire cakes for breakfast and a box of donuts for lunch.  I can take or leave desserts and rarely eat them, so it all seemed terribly unfair.  I have learned so much since then.  Like how lucky I am to not crave sweet things.  My body has a hard enough time with potatoes or bananas or toast.

Anyway, yes, I remember desserts!  Chocolate ice cream, brownies, coconut cream pie, carrot cake with cream cheese frosting and chewy oatmeal raisin cookies.  I like those five, but can’t remember the last time I ate any of them.  I think it’s strange how we mess around with fruit making it in to pies and jams and cobblers and tarts.  Just eat the damn raw fruit, it’s fine the way it is.  Said the person who hates to cook.

Bonus question: What are you grateful for from last week, and what are you looking forward to in the week coming up?

I am grateful that W has not mentioned anything about Christmas music until today.  Wow, the 17th of December.  That’s gotta be a new record.  Normally by the 7th or so I am already having that swing twirling puke-type reaction to anything Jingle Bells related.  Now we have the sat radio on one of the (least offensive to me) Christmas stations.  He set the volume and I turned it down a notch.  See how we compromise and get along?  If he turns it to the country channel we are getting a divorce.

So next week is Christmas!  Wow, that snuck up on us while we weren’t looking.  There will be a turkey dinner but I don’t know yet what day, just that it will be after the 25th this year.  I like to carry on my mother’s tradition of celebrating Christmas on whatever day appears to be the one on which the highest number of people are likely to show up.  The Wing-It Family Christmas.

W’s six-week check up is next week (he will actually be seven weeks post op by then) and he should get the okay to drive, fingers crossed.  The chauffeurs life is not for me and I will gladly give it up.

Have a Happy Thursday and a great rest of the week!

share-your-world2

W is for W

It’s the first official day of retirement for W (second time around) and already midway through the day he’s showing signs of withdrawal and inability to cope.  If he says “Well, this is really weird” one more time I’m going to lose it.  He’s been off somewhere doing stuff no less than four times already.  Right now he’s driving across to the west side of the city to get a part for something because the exact part he’s after apparently does not exist here on the east side.

When I booked my two week trip to Ontario W assured me that he would still be here to pick me up from the airport when I got back on the 17th.  Of course I was way too smart to believe that for a minute.  Now that the ice is gone and Dan has been phoning and he has all this time on his hands, his own departure date gets bumped back daily. If he sticks around for Easter weekend I’ll be very surprised.  He can’t go until the furnace is installed though and I’m not sure if that’s going to be completed today or not, but the guy is still  banging around down there in fits and starts, because he keeps driving off to retrieve things he needs too. They both have some kind of parts neurosis.

W is also for WARP.  Lots of things can be warped – your mind, your sense of humor, your imagination, your values, your floorboards.  You can warp a ship into position, and travel at warp speed.  You need those warp threads to go with the weft or woof ones to weave.  Space and time and light can all be warped.  It’s a very handy word to use if something is twisted, distorted or perverted.  Also useful for insulting someone without being overly specific.  My husband is WARPED could mean anything.

I’m not exactly moving at warp speed getting myself packed and ready to go although I’ve done several things that could have waited.  Like wash my car.  We got splatted with a super huge mud spray yesterday which covered the windshield so thoroughly that we couldn’t see for a few seconds.  But now the car is all cleaned up for two weeks of being parked in the garage.  And the beauty of staying at my sisters house is that I can borrow whatever I forget.  I’m not sure if she’s aware of that but she’ll find out soon enough.

So after the wee hours of tomorrow morning, I won’t be seeing W for about five months!!  I’ve always said this is the reason our marriage has lasted so long.  You can be married for forty years if you spend half that amount of time never really knowing for sure where the other person is.  It’s worked out well for us, anyway.

Okay, this stupid suitcase is not going to pack itself.  Time to get serious.  Five a.m always gets here faster than we anticipate.

First Impressions

There are so many things we are cognizant of in other people without being conscious of it, it’s hard to pinpoint exactly what comes first.

I meet new people every day at work.  Whether they are male or female is a good place to start I suppose.  Sometimes it’s surprisingly hard to tell, especially with little kids from other cultures. I tried to sell a small boy pink glasses once.  He looked quite pretty in them but it wasn’t the look he was going for I guess.  The male/female thing is important to sort out when directing a customer to the right section of the store, but when in doubt I just advise them to look wherever they want.

Then there’s the people who give you little choice in what you notice first.  Why else would someone do something weird and extreme to his hair if that’s not something he wants everyone who’s not legally blind to pick up on.  It’s the unremarkable ones that are harder to read or easier to ignore, and I assume that whichever it is, they’ve chosen to be that way and I respect them for that.

We look at people’s faces and we look into their eyes, listen to what they say and how they say it.  And then we kind of mirror each other back and forth.  Smile for smile, frown for frown.  I don’t really care about what you’re wearing or the length of your hair or the fact that you may have sixteen rings in your left eyebrow.

But I do care very deeply about how we choose to make each other feel.  And if you think that isn’t something that happens immediately upon meeting, you are deluding yourself.

A Letter to My Great-Great-Grandchildren

Dear Great Great Grandchildren:

Here’s the mystery solved as to why the cutlery set that has been handed down to you over these many generations is incomplete. Your great great grandfather never ate much dessert, but he sure as hell ate everything else he possibly could using nothing but the goddamn DESSERT FORKS, so I buried them all with him, he liked them so bloody much. He was just so incredibly freaking weird.

Lovingly yours,

grandmalin ❤

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