Old Lady Things

Today’s list was inspired by the temperature outside and a rare bout of insomnia.

Old Lady Things I Am Ready For Already

1. Bunny Slippers.  Big fat pink ones.
2. A walk-in sit-down shower.  Ok, I’m not really sold on the sit down part of that yet, but my knee does not like stepping over the side of the bath tub these days.  And it’s not even a very high side.  I’ll be wanting ramps instead of stairs soon.  An elevator would be nice.
3. One of those robotic vacuum things that bangs around your furniture picking up dirt while you sit on the couch wishing it was less stupid and more thorough.  But if I had one I would likely want to get a cat to ride around on it.
4. A bunch of flameless candles unlikely to burn the house down if left unattended. With a remote control.  Might as well go all out.
5. A granny shawl.  Actually two.  One for my shoulders, one for my lap.
6. A personal shopper.
7. A personal masseuse.
8. A chauffeur.
9. A pool guy.  And yes I know we don’t have a pool.
10. A tiny home.  I watched a minimalist documentary.  I think I could live that way.  Probably have to give up the pool guy though.

Seriously right now I would settle for just some big ass warm and fuzzy slippers because my feet are freezing.  And I am wearing thermal socks.

This is what my life has become.  I need a nap.

 

Room Temperature

 

Haha!  That’s my feet sticking out from underneath a throw.  If you’re thinking I’ve run out of mesmerizing topics 13 days in to this January blog-a-day thing I’ve got going on, you might be right.

But I was sitting here in my 19 degree C house admiring my new fuzzy-on-the-inside socks when it occurred to me that they are worth sharing with the world.  Hey, it’s late and I’m tired, and I’ve had one of those days.  So you get sock sharing.

Early this afternoon I went for a follow-up appointment at the ENT Clinic at the University Hospital to discuss the results of the ultrasounds and needle biopsies on my neck.

The waiting room was crowded and hot and I had my winter coat over my arm for almost an hour.  My chair was right beside the reception desk so I got to hear many one-sided phone conversations from there and from rude people on cell phones, plus people talking and a hanging television screen had the sound on.  I’m always afraid in these situations that I won’t hear my name being called.  Then I imagined what it might be like to have a hearing aid and have all these sounds amplified.  Hell, more or less.

The thermostat in the exam room read 24.8 when I got in there.  Then it went up to 24.9.  When it reached 25 I imagined what it might be like to spontaneously combust.  At 25.1 I considered stripping and lying bare skinned on the floor tiles.  It was 25.3 when I left.  Gawd only knows what it’s at now.

I’ve been seeing Dr. Rizk.  And yes, it rhymes with risk.  Once again everything has come back with all kinds of horrible things ruled out, so we know what it isn’t, but nobody knows for sure what it IS.  Or what these lumps might develop into given time.  So my options are to keep showing up for tests and check ups ad infinitum or to have them surgically removed and be done with them.  He told me to go home and think about it.

I also got a flu shot today.  And some toiletries and these amazing slipper socks.  Never before in my life have I had a problem with my feet getting cold.  I’m that person who sleeps with her feet out from under the covers.  I have put bare feet in snow boots and not complained of the cold.  But lately things have changed.  Poor circulation maybe?  Every so often my feet will suddenly be freezing cold and I have to kick off my flip-flops and scrounge around for socks.

These new ones are perfect.  And yeah, gorgeous too. We turned the heat up to 20.  Because it’s winter and we are old. And possibly because W has complained once too often about being cold and I have suddenly developed some empathy on that subject.

And THEN (will this day and the recounting of it never end….) I looked up “room temperature” although what I really meant was ambient temperature and was astounded to discover Wikipedia says its 75 F or 24 C.  I am speechless.  How can anyone stand it that hot?

Okay, your turn. Tell me I’m cold-blooded and strange.  Or is it just where you live and what you’re used to and comfortable with that determines personal ambient temperature?

I’m going to bed now and these socks are coming off.  My feet feel like they’ve been in an oven.

When in Doubt, Act Stupid

• The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt.  (Bertrand Russell)

  

  When in doubt, the person whose advice I seek first of course depends entirely on what I’m in doubt about.  Best to talk to an expert, somebody who knows.  Although great advice can also come from the most unexpected sources.  You only have to listen.

  When I’m uncertain and apprehensive, undecided, all at sea – the people who know me best and care enough to help me muddle through my current dilemma are my family.  Near or far, doesn’t matter.  I trust what they have to say, knowing it comes from the heart.

  Then I have to deal with my cold feet, qualms, second thoughts and skepticism and make the final decision that’s right for me.  All suggestions duly noted and considered, in the end I’m on my own.

  If I’m puzzled and confused about the facts, I google.

  A lot of the time I think we already know the answers, but simply need someone else to validate the way we feel and approve of the action we’ve already decided to take.

  If someone asks me for advice I tell them what I’d do if it were me.  I tell them what I think, and offer some solutions.  Or only one, if I think there’s only one that has a hope in hell of working.

  Nothing irks me more than being told that my advice is faulty, that it will never work, or that some other way is definitely better.  If you’ve asked for my advice and I’ve given it and you don’t like it, I think this conversation is done. Go ask somebody else for the answer you want.  And the next time you want my opinion, I’ll act completely stupid about it and just say I don’t know and save us both the aggravation.