List Legacy

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W has a t-shirt that says “I Drink and I Know Things”.  It was gifted to him by a friend who knows him very well.  If I had a shirt like that it would say “I Clean and I Find Things”. Not all that funny, but accurate as hell.  Mostly what I find are forgotten lists of things I’ve jotted down so I won’t forget them.  Totally useless endeavour when the list goes missing, and confusing as all get out when one turns up and makes very little sense to me in the here and now.

When I decide to clean, even if it’s something as simple as using the Swiffer duster on a shelf that the morning sun hits, illuminating a grey film that was invisible the night before and making me wonder how we can actually breathe in here,  I end up rearranging things.  Could be just items on a shelf, or could be all the furniture in a room. You just never know.

Twice this week I have moved stuff around in my bedroom, trying to accommodate a big old chair that’s worn out and uncomfortable and takes up too much space in the living room.  It’s next move may be out the front door.  The second time around for the rearranging involved moving the desk back to where it was in the first place (big sigh accompanied by eye roll) and going through its pile of miscellaneous papers which seems to accumulate even faster than the dust.

And I found a list.  Yes, I know, no one at this point is surprised.  It’s in a little black note-book which also contains some account numbers and passwords that are no longer valid because I’ve changed them.  This is exactly the kind of thing you don’t want to leave behind after you die, unless there are people you need to seriously annoy posthumously.  I have also written down my cell phone number because I have never bothered to memorize the damned thing.  It’s easy enough to find on my phone, so why did I bother doing that?  One mystery after another, right?

The list appears to be things you can do at our camp.  Or at anyone’s cottage I guess.

  • Wake up early 
  • Drink your coffee on the deck
  • Watch the early morning mist burn off the water
  • Go for a boat ride
  • Paddle a canoe
  • Go barefoot
  • Dance in the rain
  • Explore
  • Take pictures
  • Watch the birds
  • Play horseshoes
  • Make an inukshuk
  • Build a bonfire
  • Roast marshmallows
  • Watch the sunset
  • Always carry a wine glass of sufficient size to knock a bear unconscious 

That last one was SO worth waiting for.  It’s not mine, but I don’t know who to credit for it.  Someone brilliant, obviously.  I would add to that one to always keep the glass topped up so you can throw wine in the bears eyes and temporarily blind him before you turn around and run like hell.

That was more fun than finding an old grocery list or a paper from a page-a-day calendar, although I found both of those as well.  The calendar page says

Dont die green.  Die crisp and toasty brown, well lived and well loved.

Kinda sounds like bear food, but whatever.  May we all live long enough to get crispy.

Happy Sunday!

How To Amuse Yourself While Waiting

My November Day Eight
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While waiting this morning at the lab for W to get his blood work done, I saw a poster like this one across the room. The small print was too far away to read, but what would I need to read it for? I am smart and can figure things like this out. Right?

P   Pull something.
A   Agonize over the possibility that you just pulled the wrong thing.
S   Stop pulling random things, you moron!
S   Start running.
Ha! Pretty close, hey?

If you are ever in a burning building with me you will be safe as long as you can run fast.  Beyond that I’m not making any promises.

It’s a rather gloomy overcast day with wet snow and rain and a biting wind.  Perfect for lighting a gingerbread candle and staying the hell indoors.

Hope you’re snug and warm and having a relaxing Sunday afternoon.

Just Another Great Canadian Sunday

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It’s not every day I take a picture of my shampoo, so you know there’s got to be some kind of weird story behind it, right?

There’s a really good reason for me staying at home while W does most of the shopping. He is able to pick up all the items on a list, no more and no less. I admire that about him. Well, about anyone, really. The lists I take with me become vague guidelines once I enter a store. My cart fills up, and when the cashier wants to know if I found everything I was looking for I just smile and nod. Because explaining that I made six substitutions and changed my mind ten times and probably forgot at least three essentials but now couldn’t be bothered looking for them because I’m exhausted and don’t want to retrace my steps and just would like to be done with shopping and go home…..I don’t think she really wants to hear all that.

Anyway, back to the shampoo. I find it very hard to resist a good deal, even though I also firmly believe you get what you pay for. So I am one of those annoying shoppers with way too much time on my hands who will block an aisle while I check out ingredients and best buys and packaging and brands and on and on so you can see why the process is exhausting. And yes, the shampoo, I’m getting to that, I swear.  Although you can’t see it clearly in my photo, right at the top it says Proudly Canadian and underneath that, Fiers d’être Canadiens which roughly translated means proud to be (a French-speaking) Canadian.

And this bottle of shampoo cost One Canadian Dollar. OMG.

What in the world makes a shampoo uniquely Canadian? Being manufactured in Toronto? And why is it so CHEAP?? Is it complete Canadian/Canadien crap? Is this one of those instances where the store made a crazy deal and is passing the savings along to consumers? If I use this stuff will my hair turn to dandelion fluff and blow away in a high wind? Do I have any Advil at home for this headache? Better pick some up.

Anyway, long story short, although it’s too late for that, I have used this shampoo twice now and am happy to report no disasters so far. My hair is clean and shiny and still attached to my scalp.  If the Daily Basics people would like to pay me for endorsing their product I would be perfectly fine with that.  Although perhaps with that retail price they don’t have much of an advertising budget.

So that was a rather successful impulse purchase, which I believe offsets this next one.

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When W is away I drink Tassimo coffee, because I can’t figure out how to get the other coffee maker to brew half a pot that tastes right, and although the Tassimo coffee is more expensive, it likely all evens out because I’m not dumping half a pot of coffee down the sink every day. By now, if you are still reading this I’m sure you are wondering where all this information is coming from, but, more importantly WHY I’m telling you all this shit in the first place. I wish I knew. Or maybe neither of us cares but there appears to be nothing much else going on for us at the moment, so what the hell.

What I wanted to buy was a double sized Tassimo coffee in a breakfast blend. There was none to be found on the shelves, and this was the only double sized there, and the midnight eclipse thing was very appealing to me. Midnight eclipse for breakfast. Why not? BOLD is not an exaggeration I’m here to tell you. This stuff will knock your socks off. Thank God I never wear any.

Okay, I’m going to paint something now to forget the trauma of shopping. After that coffee I will probably be awake for three days. With great Canadian hair.

Have a scintillating Sunday. If it’s not too late for that.

Art du Jour 46

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I’ve been missing my charcoal.  This doesn’t look much like my magazine picture model, but I’m sure she must look like somebody.  I started off on this project with the intention of drawing 365 faces.  Obviously I’ve gone off on a lot of tangents.  Now I’m just doing a count of art days and anything goes.

It was a lovely quiet Sunday here,  once W got back inside from a couple of hours of blowing snow all over the neighbourhood this morning.

I wish I was kidding. Third day of snowfall in a row.  But higher temperatures in the forecast so it will soon be gone.  I try to never complain about rain,  because at least it’s not snow.

Does this look like a young Jane Fonda to you?  It wasn’t supposed to.  What the hell.  I’ll just pretend I meant to do that.

Art du Jour 38

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I wonder if I should tell you how many times this portrait came close to being crumpled up and chucked.  Halfway done I began to dislike her intensely.

But today I scrubbed her eyes out and redid them not so wide set,  put her in a window and declared her finished.

Or maybe it’s me that’s finished.

I suppose being critical is a good thing and will make me better.

Happy Sunday!

Well, now it is.  Earlier I wasn’t so sure.  It’s not every day you scrub somebody’s eyes out.

Art du Jour 8

Today is a six-hour travel day for me.  I will be visiting 4/5 of my grandchildren for a week.  That’s not counting dogs, the count for them being 1/2.

In lieu of writing something interesting and worthwhile I am giving you this serious little person with wonky eyebrows and one large ear to look at.  It’s difficult to take a photo of a sketch, (especially at midnight under artificial light when you should be packing) and not have the reflections on the eyeballs do funny things.  Daylight works better.

And speaking of daylight, our clocks were turned back an hour on Saturday.  Spring ahead, fall back.  End up with exactly the same amount of light you’d have if you left the clocks the hell alone.  So I’m not sure who we’re fooling with this.  A better idea would be to extend October, a month that everyone likes, by a week;  and then transfer the last week of November into December, because that month is never long enough.  Isn’t that a great idea?  Except maybe not so much for all the November novel writers who would have to type a lot faster.

My great expectations for my week away include answering some of the excellent Nano Poblano prompts and learning how to draw a realistic ear.

Enjoy your Sunday (1/5 of the total number of Sundays for this November).  If you need anything else put into fractions, just ask.

nano

Art du Jour 1

Perhaps the title should be “The Good The Bad and The Ugly”.  I am practicing drawing faces.  I gathered them all up, snapped pictures of my pictures, saved and edited them and turned them all sepia.  Because it’s a sepia kind of day.  Big fat snowflakes coming down out there.

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It’s been an interesting Sunday pursuit and I’m thinking a daily art project might be a good feature here.  For days when words fail me.  Anyway, if I do 365 of these, just imagine how good I’ll be in the 300’s!  I don’t know why everybody’s right eyeball is blurred.  Trick of the light, or the artist.

Happy Sunday.

 

Just Jazzy 296

Jazzy Does 100 Days of Happiness 83

Happiness is stumbling upon a happiness mantra - Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bhavantu  - may all beings everywhere be happy and free, and may the thoughts, words, and actions of my own life contribute in some way to that happiness and to that freedom for all.

Happiness is stumbling upon a happiness mantra – Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bhavantu
– may all beings everywhere be happy and free, and may the thoughts, words, and actions of my life contribute in some way to that happiness.

Have a safe and happy last day of August long weekend Sunday.